I’m still paying off child support arrears for my adult child. When will it stop?

Question:Divorce lawyer Leslie Lorenzano

I have been paying child support arrearages for what seems like forever.

My child is now a grown adult with a family of his own yet I am still trying to pay off child support!

Why do I have to keep paying if the money is no longer going to support my child?


Child support arrearages can build up quickly and take months or years to eliminate.

Child support arrearages do not disappear when the original support obligation terminates. So even though your son is an adult with his own family to support, you still owe money for the support you were obligated to pay when your son was a minor child.

You should not, however, be paying for any new support obligations at this point, so make sure that the support you are paying is only for the back support you owe from years past.

If you are paying for arrearages accrued while your son was a minor, you will have to continue to pay those support arrearage payments until the arrearage is paid off. When you are in arrears on support, the state may take a number of steps to force you to pay your arrearage, including garnish your wages and apply your tax refund to your arrearage.

The court can also charge interest for your arrearage. The support you pay continues to go to the person you owed the payments to, presumably the mother of your son. You may not file bankruptcy on your child support arrearages, and the support arrearage will not go away until it is paid in full.

The best way to determine how to eliminate your arrearage is to first check with the Child Support office to determine how much arrearage you still owe and ensure that this is the correct amount (calculation errors can be made by the state).

If the amount owed is incorrect from some reason, such as you were held liable for support after your child was declared emancipated by the court or you were held liable for support in an amount different from the court-ordered amount, you may petition the court to fix your child support obligation.

If the amount you owe is correct, then you are obligated to pay that amount in full eventually. You may be able to contact the child support division of the prosecutor’s office to discuss settling on your arrearage as well.

Cordell & Cordell has divorce attorneys located nationwide.


Leslie Lorenzano is a Staff Attorney in the Indianapolis, Indiana office of Cordell & Cordell where she practices domestic relations exclusively. Ms. Lorenzano is licensed in the state of Indiana and the U.S. District Court Sothern District of Indiana. Ms. Lorenzano received her Bachelor of Arts in Sociology from Purdue University, and her Juris Doctor from the University of Arizona – James E. Rogers College of Law.

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170 comments on “I’m still paying off child support arrears for my adult child. When will it stop?

    paying arrears, to child?
    Recently my husband has meet his 20 year old son for the first time, he know lives with us and his new family, he has stated that he has NOT lived with his mother since the age of 16! can we look into this and get 2 years of arrears taken off? Also can his rent and expenses be taken off our back support, or is there a way to pay his son the money or even the step-father that supported him rather then a mother that is bi-polar and not stable.

    first off my kids mother ran off with my kids when they were ages 4 and 1 married and had three other children, i guess things got rough for her and she filed support on me when they were ages 17 and 14. state went back five years on me which i thought was not fair but at any rate i caught up and paid until i received a letter stating my obligation was over, two years later i received a letter saying there was a mistake and i was in arrears for the past 2 years and now i owe 7,000 and change due to interest at no fault if mine , now garnishing my S.S check 150 a month will take me 8 years to pay wiw !!! also if a mother is on welfare how do i own her anything, when i. and everyone else working is contributing to that check what support has she paid ? if i have to pay arrears it should go to the state not her she doesn’t deserve a dam penny…

    My husband deals with it..she brought him into court and told the judge he is a deadbeat and doesn’t pay the support..the judge looked down and her papers and looked at her and said he does pay every week..what I happening is you get state benefits. So the child support he is paying weekly you are not getting it directly from DOR. The rude b$t*? Inturepted with the so yea if he doesn’t pay then obviously I won’t get it. Ha well that upset the judge she put her whole business out there! She goes “well this man pays weekly and since you have decided to have two more kids and no job the Money goes to eaither your section 8 or food stamps or the cash benefits that you get” obviously his ex argued the fact she wanted cash and she wanted more a week…judge said she can’t change the fact that the state takes it and puts it towards say housing…helping keeping a roof over the child’s head is supporting his child. And she was denied a rise in support because she was not working and getting so many benefits..

    The child support will go to the state if she has in fact collected welfare. Also if you have the letter stating you were done paying child support then take it up to the child support office and show them. If they refuse to do anything, file a motion to see a judge.

    We needed child support reform. Your wife/husband left you and took your kid(s) away, should it be your responsibility or his/her to take care of them. If he/she don’t have the financial to take care of them, he/she should return them or left without them in the first place.

    I read all this and some write calling scumbag father’s cause of getting behind in support. I get it and I know all about the bitter. My ex to this day will do whatever she can to drive my kids from the truth of our split, it’s all about me and how I failed and she was just perfect. Iv paid over $100,000 in support and still owe another $50,000 in back support and that’s 2 children. I’m just a blue-collar welder and iv worked my rear off to make sure I could keep support going to my children and never even tried to lower it because I didn’t want to take away from them. Now doing this ment working multiple jobs, side jobs and even donating plasma sometimes to make ends meet. We’ll obviously this has taken loads of time away from spending with my children. So she likes to use that as dagger cause she knows how much it hurts. Now I have no problem supporting my children, I wouldn’t have it anyother way but when is unfair for the state to charge the 300 percent rate of interest or whatever it is because how can $20,000 turn to $50,000. Anyway all you that like to bash on father’s and call them deadbeats cause they owe back support, just make sure you know the story. And yes, to the crap father’s who won’t work deliberately so they won’t pay, really!! Cause that’s how it is with my step children so I know all about that to.

    It don’t matter if he live with you guys now. If ur husband was doing what he was suppose to do as a father. He would have known where he son live at. Another thing if the son didn’t live with the mother than your husband need to pay support to who ever were taking care of him. In my eyes he need to pay every dime.

    Kim you sound very bitter.Speaking from experience,some mothers don’t want fathers to know where their/her children are.So they move away and remarry.All the while filling the kids heads with lies about their father.We fathers have to not only battle these women,but also a system that discriminates against fathers.It’s called “Indentured Slavery”. For whatever reason some fathers get behind on support,we should not have many of our civil rights taken away.

    Gerald, you are a special kind of stupid. If you were a man, you would have helped financial provide for your children instead of not paying or simply complaining about it. If you helped support these children instead of dodging it, it would not be an issue. This world sure is full of scum.

    Maybe she has good reason, not all men are bad supporters! It’s the ones who jump as soon as they are told to support. Knowing where their kids are and not making efforts to be in the child(ren) life. Both parents have that obligation to support, it’s not a fair system either if the system fails the parent taking full responsibility when the other goes AWOL. Sometimes court is the last resort! Thumbs up for those parents that support their children without an enforcement in place. I’m going through it right now, on the receiving end. I’m getting close to getting nothing while on the system and my ex is planning to quit work to avoid paying what he owes in arrears and hide! Got to show the love, be persistent and the child(ren) will know, understand and make the choices some day to be in the other parent’s life or not. I believe karma watches all the time! You get, what you give.

    Exactly I appreciate your professional and fair assessment of the system. The real question what can we do to fix the unfair judgements against the non-custodial parent?

    From my experience and the other 460,000 people the state of Texas say they owe child support would you believe in this state the OAG is proud that collected over $ 30 billion, I guaranteed it was calculated on inaccurate records, how do you fix that they smell blood

    Every bitter, I’m not a man,a mother who was absence in her children’s lives for 1 year. Only because my mother died my only living relation was out of state in the army took his last leave day for the furanal. And after 15 years of marriage it wasn’t pretty. So I owe 330,000 for 1 year.I’ve spent 30,60,90,120 in jail for contempt of court. If he dies do I still owe. By the way the youngest is 25. Un-fricking believable.

    Modifying child support arrears of an adult child.
    My ex-husband is over 60,000.00 in child support arrears for 2 children. He had not paid child support in over 12 years and the children are now adults. He had recently been approved for Social Security benefits and his checks are being garnished by the Child Support Enforcement Agency $157.00 a month. What is the procedure for modifying the court order arears when the children are now adults.

    Paying Interest Till I die
    I had a judgement for $10,000 child support arrears and have since paid off the original $10,000 + $40,000 in interest. My payments seem like they are not brining down the arrears but merely paying the accumulated interest. Is there a cap to how much I must continue to pay in interest or can they make me pay $100,000 of interest on a $10,000 debt for the rest of my life?

    Jeff i’m in same boat too.”Paying til day i die”, And that A-hole Obama say’s there’s a war on women !!! here’s one example for ya. My brother put his then wife thru tech school and makes a good living.But when she divorced my bro,she got the house,C.S.,and remarried.
    Count em,that’s 3 incomes,and she still want’s more !!! My ex came from Ecuador,here in U.S. a few yrs. before we met and married.I’m U.S. citizen and ex military,but when she divorced me after 1 kid,she had more rights than me.War on women ? K.M.A. Obama !!!

    Me too! I think the only thing to do least try to fix it ban together in volume, hold legislature accountable

    Lmfa attacking Obama and teying to defend not paying cs. Poor guys and tgis horrific war on them for not paying for their kids. The enitre country is sick of woman making less than men in some jobs and laws already passed being brought up like some want go go back in time. Here is a big clue for you. Pay your child support!!!!! What makes any parent not paying think that the other parent who does pay and take care of their child is the bad person. When a child is hungry in need of shelter ect. The parent doing the job doesn’t have the luxury to say oh im gonna miss a payment. You should have to pay interest. You took from Your own children by getting behind. And yes things happen in life but the amount many of you owe shows you didn’t take care of your children in the least for a very long time. What a bunch of cry babies trying to avoid responsibility and blaming others. There is no war on men. Good dads who take care of their kids, spend time with them and pay their support are appreciated and nobody is fed up with them. Raising a child cost way more than any of the back support many of you are crying about owing. Calling a lady bitter because she called out those NOT responsible. And yes a dead beat mom deserves no respect either.

    Social Security being garnished?
    To IMomMom. Hold on a sec! I thought Social Security was exempt from child support collection. This doesn’t sound right to me. Is this based on state?

    WRONG! You think because you are getting SS, you get that free and clear and your child/Custodial parent is out of luck? Wow, just wow. Didn’t you get a conscience/soul when you were born? You need to find God.

    I just found out that my father has been paying arrears to my mother for years. I understand the concept of arrears, however, the arrears is only owed due to the fact that my mother had committed welfare fraud. Obviously there is a statute of limitations and nothing can be done about the fraud. My question is, since my father took care of us our entire lives and we are all now grown with our own families, what can I do to help him so he is not giving her money that she is not entitled to?

    I received full custody of my sons from their mom but what I want to know is since the Amended custody order I am no longer obligated to pay support to her but am still accumulating arrears on top of what I already had. I don’t know why I still have to pay since I have full custody and they live with me and have for over a year and a half!!!

    I heard that the ex can petition the court to excuse the non custodial parent from owing arrears even if there is already a balance. Is that true?

    Depending on the state where child support is established a case can be closed by the custodial parent by request.

    Hi Mark,i heard same thing.But i suspect not many women want to part with the money.
    But a hail mary is better than nothing. Good Luck !!!

    When will it end?
    My husband is still paying child support arrears on his two adult children, that no longer live with their mother. Isn’t there anything that can be done to aleviate this issue. $200 weekly is killing us. My husband is not a deadbeat dad but enough is enough already….HELP!

    Some one should sue the State of California for insane intrest rates on late child support payments
    I am a father who paid child support to my ex girlfriend and I brought cloths and school supplies for my children and paid for whatever they needed when I was employed when ever I was late on payments child support charged me intrest like the kids are credit cards or something the ex did not even have my kids for long periods of time and I still pay even when my kids lived with me I had to pay this is wrong and I know that their has to be help some where to stop this .

    Hi Ken,I heard that the only 2 ways were to ask your ex to petition court to stop.
    Or to pay off balance of course.Yes it is insane,and makes you wonder how much the federal government is making out of this.I’m sure they are violating our constitutional rights,but it will take time and millions of dollars to fight the fed’s and their greed.

    Why did you by clothes and school supplies for the children? You should have been sending all of that to the state for child support.

    Well most of us decide to go the extra mile and do more than the minimum when we can. I pay over 1k a month in support, buy his school and summer clothes, Halloween costumes, shoes, entertainment, school supplies, bought him a bed since him and his brother were sleeping on nasty old mattresses on the floor, helped his mom out many times financially for food and bills and formula and diapers and wipes for her kid that wasn’t mine. So with that all being said why should I pay the state and have the state give her the money when obviously it isn’t going towards my son, with me taking full responsibility financially and even having to help a lot more for their house why don’t I just have custody? She doesn’t really pay Rent since she gets SSI, she doesn’t have to buy food because she gets food stamps, she doesn’t have to pay electric, gas, or water/trash since it is included in rent. So where in any way shape or form is she providing for my child? The state and myself are the sole providers for my son. All this talk about dead beat dads well how about deadbeat moms that get so much yet make their kids wear clothes that are torn and dirty or too small meanwhile she has her weed and alcohol and cigarettes and phone. And yes many times she had enough of the aforementioned when she asked for my help. Oh and to put icing on the cake last year I also bought his brother (not my child) his school clothes and supplies and Halloween costume since his mother didn’t want to provide. And she manipulates him and tells and teaches him to do bad things, even told him that her felon boyfriend was his father, “real father” so he was confused from the get go when I came into his life. The only reason I looked at this post is because I’m going after custody to give him the life he deserves, and was wondering how the retro active support works in my situation. But some of the comments from both sides are atrocious to say the least. A better life isn’t always with the mother or custodial parent, like in my case where rules, structure, stability and a better environment and more financially sound family is what is “in the best interest of the child” as custodials and lawyers and judges like to put it.

    We need to start up a group! We need help to fight a lot of the unfair issues going on with the non custodial parent. The calculation used in California makes it impossible for the non custodial parent to even live in a house that is suitable for children to come and visit and keep food on the table. This is insane! When need to get something on a ballot. We have to come together and rally. We need to form a group a site. Do a march. Get politicians paying attention. Get this on a ballot! There is more unhappy people about this then there are happy people…that actually vote anyways. If that makes sense. The people receiving these benefits from the hard working non custodial parent…most are not voters. We non custodial parents that pay CS and taxes are voters. We need to march at the capital and get something on a ballot!! Who can help me start this campaign? We need a non profit organization. “Parents against California’s Child Support Calculator” Who is with me?

    child support
    My husband owes back child support. He is willing to pay every cent he OWES. My concern is the interest that is accruing. His ex-wife continues to apply all payments to to the interest. We haven’t even touched the the back support yet.Shouldn’t the payment be applied to the support first then the interest? as i calculate it, it will take 8 years to pay the interestand thats no tincluding the new years interest she adds on.We live in New York

    I didn’t read everyone’s comment but the original reply did not answer the question of WHY he is still paying his arrearages if his adult child is not receiving any of it??? WHO IS GETTING THE MONEY IF THE CHILD IS AN ADULT AND ISN’T RECEIVING IT? and….why is this happening?

    Presumably the mother is receiving the money since the deadbeat father failed to help support his children when they were minors.

    Hi Ava,Many times i have wondered that.Only thing that makes sense is that the government is making a killing on the interest.Taxation w/o representation.

    I believe there should be a limit on arrears. I owe 118,000.00 dollars on arrears. They charge me 465.38 per month on interest. They sometimes deduct from my pay check 115.38 per week. At the end of the month since it’s not 500.00 dollars, they give my ex the 465.38 dollars plus they added the interest on the balance. So you see this is a never ending prose’s. You get disappointed. It’s like buying a house and the balance keeps on going up. I’m 60 yes. Old and I’m going to die before I finish paying.

    In 1989 My ex wife filed for divorce and her brother was her attorney. I’m sure you can guess where this us going? At the time I was working part time at Sears at $8.00 a hour and my take home pay was $250.00. Because I sold fireworks to earn some extra cash in five days I made $750.00. Her brother the attorney told the court the week I sold fireworks was my true earning potential and I was ordered to pay $300.00 a week plus $65.00 a week for child care. 30 years later my kids are grown and married but I owe $23,500 in arranges that will take me at least 15 more years to pay off with interest and fees. Many weeks my take home was less than $60.00 a week after taxes and support. In 1989 My taxes showed I made 18,000 and was ordered to pay over $15,000! It’s a fair system for sure! Warning to the guys out there, don’t believe your ex wife when she tells you, her brother will take care of both of you to save you some money. When you get to court it won’t happen that way for sure. One error and I’ll pay to the day I die. He told me I wouldn’t need a attorney, boy was I stuped. Good luck LAWRENCE

    I had a baby when I was 16yrs old with a women that was 22yrs old at tha time and married. Little girl has the ex husbands last name and is 8yrs old now. Now she’s going after me for child support after 8 yrs the little girl is mine its exactly me. But what can I do from all that back pay child support?

    Ok. So when a parent fails/or is ordered to pay arrearage then you have to pay. The money goes to. the custodial parent which is typically the mother. Just because the child is an adult now doesnt mean the arrears disappears in thin air.i dont understand whats so hard to grasp about the concept.

    Clearly you don’t understand the whole thing natasha.It is more than you think,A LOT MORE !!! Sooooooo much to tell you and so little time and space here.Talk to a few divorced fathers first and then you probably wont want your son to ever marry.

    what a shame for all who are struggling to survive
    I paid my child support but when i returned from being overseas in the service
    the x went for more due to the extra money I earned for being overseas and was awarded it. and now I owe more then I can pay in a few years plus the children will be adults
    gotta love this system
    it stinks and they get away with it

    Combat pay, overseas pay, BAH are all exempt from child support calculations, Base Pay is all that can be calculated. The reason is that the other pays are either temporary (which is covered and unable to get any court or legal changes while you are overseas under SCRA servicemembers civil relief act. It is a Federal Law) or they fluctuate depending on duty station zip code etc. I would go to JAG and let them know what happened if you are still in, if not then look for a former JAG lawyer that practices law.

    I feel that once the child reaches adulthood, if the noncustodial parent still owes arrears, then they should go to the child. I am a custodial parent, and when my children get their child support, I do not keep it, and they are still minors (I only help them manage their money and they do quite well), however, I feel that when they reach adulthood the youngest child should receive the money in his/her name. Here in TX the custodial parent gets it in form of a debit card or direct deposit, so I feel once the child graduates/reaches 18, the card should come in his/her name. The money is for the children, after all.

    You sound really dumb and good thing their not going by how you feel. No one cares how you feel. The money is owed to the mother that took care of the children alone, when the father wasn’t helping. After all, it is called BACK child support! It refers to unpaid child support payments that were missed in the PAST. Generally speaking, for instance, a parent may have a legal obligation to make monthly child support payments for the child’s basic necessities.

    How does the CUSTODIAL PARENT who is not using the money on herself, rather she is using it what it was intended for THE CHILDREN sound dumb by being an example of how child support should be handled? I believe your moniker is a direct reflection of your intelligence which is sad. Go ahead and tell someone else what they can and can’t do with their money and they will tell you to F off. At least that person is doing the RIGHT THING as opposed to leaving the children in rags while they live the high life.

    Child Support
    Hello everyone,

    I want to just explain a few things. When a parent owes arrearage, it means at some point they failed to meet the child support obligations which leaves the custodial parent to fully take care of the child with no help. This money is owed back to the custodial parent and not the child even if they are adults or not. Please keep in mind this is money being paid back and the custodial parent that was left unpaid when the non custodial parents was not keeping up with the payments. It takes 2 parents to support a child. I don’t understand why it is so hard to understand about arrears. My ex owes me $27,000 and I struggle every day. However, I will do all I can to support my kids.

    Probably because your not men ? Most fathers i know are struggling too,and not living it up.Plus nobody helps men,but women can get all kinds of help.If you knew what divorced fathers have to go thru,you would be glad your a women instead.Women who complain just don’t have all the facts straight.

    I’m a woman who pays my ex child support. I have no complaints paying it because it is for my son and his father is able to provide him with a better living situation than I could on my measly income. By the way, I work two jobs and am living with my parents in order to meet the amount of child support payment I was ordered to pay. It’s not just men who have to pay up. I owe this to my son and if that means I have to do without for awhile then so be it. I’ve made every payment on time but still had to pay arrears due to the courts taking their sweet time deciding how much I would have to pay. I understand the system isn’t finely tuned and it’s difficult for all of us, men and women alike, to get out of the hole the government has put us in. It’s not always the one who has to pay. There are people who make their payments, as they should, but can’t get out of the hole we were forced in.

    I totally applaud you in the decision of truly what’s in the best interest of your child. A true parent and mother, I sure hope when your child grows up they know exactly why and how you did things to make sure they had the best life possible.

    Child support can become a scam. Imagine a father who is not behind at all in the arrears but the court order has him paying for daycare expenses and the child hasn’t been to daycare in over 7 years…she is almost 11 years old now. Her sister is age 19 and because the support was established together and they are still taking out child support for her as well. She will soon be 20. North Carolina is a rip off for the system.

    Regrettably, child support have evolved (or rather, devolved) into a system that persecutes non-custodial parents, generally (though far from always) men. The federal government pays the states for the money they collect, so the states will do virtually anything to collect it. Destroy its citizens, wreck familities, whatever. Everyday I go to work and pay my child support for my two children, but I know that once day something will happen and I will get behind and I will be destroyed and they won’t have a father anymore. That doesn’t matter though, it’s all about the money.

    Michael you are so right,but i read so many nasty comments from women about fathers.
    but we know that they have no clue.

    If you paid, there wouldn’t BE arrears to contest
    Several comments here:

    1) Social Security Disability is NOT exempt from child support—they will with hold it and send it to the child, often at a higher rate than what state guidelines would have calculated for child support obligations.

    2) Arrears can still be enforced, even after a child emancipates, and can even be applied against the estate of the parent obligated to pay should they become deceased.
    a) Arrears are owed to the CUSTODIAL PARENT, as they are the ones that had to take up the slack when the Non custodial parent did not meet child support obligations while the child(ren) was a minor.
    b) If interest becomes an issue, try to pay ahead so less interest is assessed—tax returns, for example? I know it isn’t what you want to hear, but again, had the payments come on time (and believe me, I know things happen) there wouldn’t even BE any arrears to discuss now.
    c) If a custodial opens a case and also wants arrearage (such as for the man above who has an 8-yr old little girl), the custodial parent can only go back THREE YEARS for the arrearage. Also, since she was married at the time, her husband is the “Legal Father” and will have to be disestablished by DNA first before any obligation can be assigned to the biological father (who will also need to be DNA’d if he does not voluntarily acknowledge the child at that point).

    3) For the military person who stated that while he was deployed his ex “went for more money”, she couldn’t have accomplished this without you being served and made aware of what she was doing. If you were making more money then, she had the rights to ask for more from you to help support your child. If you are no longer making that kind of money, you have the right to request a modification in the courts to reduce your obligation based on both of your incomes.

    4) Generally, you must prove you have a significant change(in income/circumstance/disability/etc) to request a modification if your support order is less than 3 yrs old. However, if the order is over three years old, you will receive a notification that clearly states that you have the rights to ask for/request a modification of your support order/obligation. If you do not keep your address updated with your local Child Support Enforcement office, or you do not exercise these rights that are available, then you will be the one to miss out.

    Just some free advice…. Hope it helped at least one person.

    I agree with most except the service member one, she had no right while he was overseas because he fell under the SCRA which is a protection for such circumstances and is a FEDERAL LAW which can not be superseded. What happened was illegal, the ONLY thing that is considered for child support payments is his BASIC PAY. That is it. Plain and simple he got screwed and once he finds a decent lawyer it will be fixed. The reason only basic pay is the only inclusion is because all other pays are either temporary which do not warrant the requirements for a modification, or they fluctuate which also unable to be a reason for modification. Anyways that is my $.02

    Child support arrears
    Pay what you owe up to the point he turned 18 or age of emancipation. if you have paid that in full everything you are paying now is going to the state. since your obligation to your child has been paid in full the state is raking in the arrears that they added on. the state makes a mint off child support arrears and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Why should so much interest be added? it is wrong!! once the child becomes of age interest should stop but it does not. broken and corrupt system.

    reform child support laws
    How do we go about reforming the child support laws in California as well as the other States on back child support and the interest rates. Can the state of California be sued for embezzling and extortion of back child support to help finance their administration fees. Because that’s what there doing. that’s what the White House is a lot of it that’s what the White House is allowing and all our congressman.

    One law to change, why do the person paying the support also have to pay the taxes on it, but the person that gets it is tax free? If they have custody of there children they all ready get a big tax break?

    Arrears and Interest Go to Custodial Parent
    In response to Tina’s comment above, the state does not “make a mint” off child support arrears. This is absurd. i am a custodial parent receiving arrearage payments plus interest from a noncustodial parent who decided not to pay child support payments for years. All of it goes to me. The state takes nothing and is entitled to nothing. That’s just complete misinformation.

    Actually, states DO make money off child support collections. They receive federal funding that is directly based on the number of child support cases they pursue and are able to collect funds on. It amounts to millions of dollars in free revenue for the states.

    Nearly every state also charges custodial parents a processing fee, which is included in the child support payments, but which goes to the state, not to the custodial parent. Again, that equals more revenue for the states.

    I totally agree its hard enough to pay child support and live on what’s left, than to have to pay interest on it too… how is anyone suppose to live ..I know a guy who pays CS and works 80 hours and his take home pay is only $130 , how does a man survive? The courts are way too harsh and charge way too much, the rules need to be reevaluated..the rights are too unfair!

    Let’s start a campaign ourselves. Because nobody else gives a damn !!!
    Anybody know how to start this organization ? I’m in if you want to get started.

    If you paid on time there would be no interest. Don’t understand what the problem is. If its too hard for you to pay then go to the judge and have it reduced. My guess is you have plenty of money

    My wife and I separated in 2001 and filed for divorce, she immediately agreed to me having custody of my son. until the divorce was actually final in 2004 I shared a joint account with my ex and put money into this account every two weeks for her expenses and car payments and for my daughter. in 2005 my daughter came to live with me full time and I was still being charged support for arrears on both kids which I just had stopped on my son 2 years ago. I found out that I was being charged for the money she was receiving for being on public assistance and she was still claiming the kids lived with her while I’m being charged for the money that my kids weren’t seeing. now I recently looked at a statement that showed my principle balance at 230.00 and interest at 5000.00. my kids are adults now and lived with me through the majority of this situation. his there any help for the widows son?

    Wow as I read this I sure can see all the deadbeat dads who owe back support or the spouses of those owing! If you are a parent and you choose to not pay for your kids then why should you be let off the hook just because your child turned 18? I am the daughter of a deadbeat who owes my mom arrears of over $900,000 because of interest and the 16 yrs of non payment! Why should interest be charged because thats a debt you owe to someone. If you owe any company, dr office anything it accrues interest! Why would/should this debt be any different. When you stopped paying your kids felt the pain! Less food..less Mom time…Less clothes all the things a kid needs to live now has to be covered by the custodial parent. I had to step up and act as an adult at 12 because my dad didn’t want to pay…how fair is that? It wasn’t, now hes finally got “recorded” money coming in my moms getting some arrears! She giving some of it to us..now my mom has passed and my dad gets to collect his full checks and continue to say F You to his kids! I’m sickened by the fact that people really think its acceptable to not pay for their kids and just live their happy little life! You are hurting your kids NOT their ex when you don’t pay!

    Sorry u went through that,but truth is that MOST men are NOT deadbeat dads.
    I got laid off work as just one example,so i got behind.The interest is so high that i can NEVER catch up. My interest is 5 times the actual amount.Even though she kept hiding my daughter from me.Everythings not just one way.

    Told by Attorney for Child Support, I make too much money
    I have been paying 900 in child support for over 7 years, while I was being jerked around about seeing my kids. Finally decided to file for a visitation order, only to have the mother re-up for more child support. Naturally, I have gotten raises since it began, and was now ordered to pay way over $1800 in support plus arrear payments ($150 per mo) because they back dated 5 months. As I argued articulately with the judge, claiming Child Support is not supposed to transfer wealth, he ignored me and entered the final judgment against me. This literally destroyed me, the Judge might as well have given me a foreclosure notice on my home, because now, Im left with a lil over $1000 bucks to pay a mortgage ($1600) utilities and other bills. My mortgage was late for the first time, and Im barely keeping utilities on and defaulting on loans. Is this really what the Child Support system is about? Disenfranchising men and some women? If it is then our legal system is sadly misguided. All they took into account was interest and principal on mortgage payment, and I guess you’re not supposed to have lights and gas on in your home or pay the taxes on your property. This system sends more men into poverty than any other thing that could possibly happen to them. Then you try to get a second job, or a promotion so you can live, then they take that……

    I know,that’s why i live in another country.A free’er one with less corruption,and men are still able to be men.I’m ex-military,but that means nothing anymore.Just propaganda for the masses.My foreign ex-wife has more rights than me.We men need to organize and overthrow this corrupt regime

    Natasha, the reason why that concept is so hard for non-custodial parents to grasp that thought is they think that because their offspring is now an adult, what they owe should be forgiven. They think that as long as they can “hide out” until the child is 18 years, they should be free and clear. They don’t view it as what it really and truly is which is simply reimbursing the custodial parent back monies for covering their sorry assess all those years, and even then, it never normally comes close.

    Arrears = “reimbursment”.

    Hint: Don’t let other people cover your portion of financial responsibilities and you wont have to worry about paying them back. Contribute to their upbringing like a responsible adult should! But no! Alot of people seem to think it’s fine to dodge paying their share and allow the custodial parent to cover their portion and then when age 18 rolls around, *poof*, they no longer owe.

    The State of Indiana supports this concept, meaning, if you’re a non-custodial parent who owes back support, you can avoid paying child support (there are no consquences) and if you can manage this for 18 years, they will terminate the original Court Order and they will NOT go after you for arrears. You will be able to pay $5 a year if you like, or, simply NOT pay at all! In other words, Court Ordered Child Support in Indiana is “optional”. Yes, thats right, “OPTIONAL”!

    Beeville Texas Minds
    Child Support is stupid period! Its to help the child, yes, but after watching my neighbor complain that 480 isn’t enough is rediculous! &I seen that she took the childs father to court for mor money. She barely has the child anyway, but she would always come by & ask if I needed anything &came back with stupid junk that she regret getting so she sold for not even half price but for less. I think that “Mothers” like myself should save receipts or to be tracked on what they spend the kids money on. My daughters father put himself on child support, if he’s late on a payment I do not complain because I wasn’t the one that put him on that. No matter how bad I may need it I don’t complain. I don’t need a man in a suit telling their father when to see his child and when not to, that is just plain rediculous, I learned by watching these females (so called mothers) spend their child support on drugs, beer, clothes for themselves, spending it on other people, and cry to want more! Someone should handle this crap seriously because its like these “fathers” are working their butts off just to support their kids &the mothers are calling them low downs when they don’t get more, LADIES!? THE MEN ARE DOING IT FOR THE CHILD NOT FOR YOUR BOYFRIENDS, OR YOUR DRUGS & ALCHOHOL, stop with the so called “deadbeat” when you don’t know the meaning of the word. 480 is enough for your child maybe even OVER ENOUGH. I get 65 every month & its enough for my daughter, so don’t f**kn complain getting 480, be glad you even get a freaking dime anyway! Because weither or not he worked his ass off for that dime. He still owes 1,000 but that’s effecting him not me.

    I find these statements frightening / regardless it is you’re responsible to pay your child support on time. If you don’t pay your payments on time interests is incurred. If your child graduates and becomes an adult that money is still owed to the parent who took care -supported emotionally and financially all those years you decided not to, you’re still obligated .My ex has Dodged paying child support for 17 years and is in arrears of close to $85,000. Now ,not all women support their dealer boyfriend or alcohol or whatever you were saying ,sometimes A woman works two jobs and struggles to support their child by themselves with no help but only A prayer every day .Sometimes a MAN – a real man ,comes into their life and helps provide and loves and gives of time and self for children that are not biologically his but by doing so they become emotionally his forever. If the man who has been dodging me all this time contacted me and asked – I would wipe the arrears because her real father raised her /the man who coached softball/ kissed boo-boos/ went to every school function threw birthday parties /listened to her losses & cheered her victories: took summer trips / that is her dad. And if the guy would just stop running and acknowledge that he no parent and never was it could all be over. Maybe someday he’ll stop running and realize I really don’t care /none of us really care.

    And the reason I’m here reading this is not because I want child-support but I did have a question on how to handle it when after all this time I’ve received paperwork that they put in IWN in place because apparently he finally decided to get a job and I don’t want his money.

    MLara – after reading your post I don’t understand how $65 can be enough /that wont even cover a doctors visit but everyone’s financial situation is different.perhaps you’re in a better financial situation than some of the mothers that Have commented on here about the arrears that are owed to them and if I needed the Money that is owed to me maybe I would be a little more bitter about being owed $85,000.as it is my husband and I struggled /got our child graduated and into college and are helping her financially still. The biological donor never paid a dime/but he missed out on a lot of other things -he never saw first day of kindergarten -a softball game -her in her prom dresses -graduation day -her college entrance- so he’s lost more by not providing financially or emotionally to this wonderful person that is my daughter.

    c’mon fellas. if you owe anyone anything just because you stop paying them doesn’t mean you don’t still owe them…
    there is no reason why a father shouldn’t have to pay what he owes just because he didn’t pay. because many “men” (rolls eyes) don’t pay child support their children burden others with paying for their welfare checks, food stamps, free school lunches, medical, dental and daycare etc. if everyone else has to pay for your kid for 18 years, too friggin bad if you have to pay back what you didn’t pay and made everyone else have to.

    it’s sad when workers can’t afford medical care for themselves because they are taxed have to pay it for some deadbeat. that takes away from helping build roads, build schools, job programs, their medical and even food of of their plates. when me and my family suffer, I don’t have a gram of pity nor respect for someone that was the cause of it…

    Child support is use to put the non-custodial parent in poverty,if the government really want to help the children then they would work on helping the parents to work together and help teach them to be parents,punishing the non-custodial parent dose not help the child,it only make the children hate.

    Some custodial parents use the child support system as a tool to punish the non-custodial parent because he moved on and doing well and they are not.i am responsible to do my part for the child,but i shouldn’t be responsible for the mother and her children she had with another man,and i shouldn’t be responsible if the custodial parent decide to get on welfare and is to lazy to work,or had to many children.

    Just Pay Up..
    My Ex was ordered to pay $253.00 monthly over 18 years ago.. Obviously that is not nearly enough to help supplement raising a child. He had regular visitation rights in the past until my son refused to see him that frequently. He owns his own company has some how always been able to dodge the system I haven’t received a dime and he now owes approx. $75,000,00 in arrears. Our son is now 20 and in college and yes the money would still helpful as we need to pay for tuition, books, etc… I’ve taken on a much bigger debt (financially) over the years getting him to where he is a successful young man and I have had a legal obligation to pay it back; so why shouldn’t I be obligated to get repaid for what was rightfully owed to me?

    Pay Up.. You’re hurting no one besides your kids..

    hI, I currently have custody of my son his mother was order to pay child support 4yrs ago
    in the state of California. she did not pay for three years and owed over $11,000 in arrears
    now the department of child support services has closed the case because she was living in another state and not working and she all of sudden she owes nothing….my son is now living with her and child support department says there is nothing that can be done….how can she get away without supporting her kid all those years and not owe a penny? and now she is going to file for support and make me pay. I dont know what to do.

    Arrears and Interest is not extra money!
    My ex finally paid off his arrears when my son was 22. The only reason it was paid off was because they seized his federal return. For years, my son’s father worked under the table. My now husband and I had to pay for him without any help. This includes food, shelter, medical, and clothes. It’s not cheap to raise a child. We used credit cards that accrued interest when we didn’t have the cash. We still have to pay off those credit cards.

    My son’s fathers original order was $50 a week. Then moved up to $67.50 when my son was 10. That is not a lot of money barely covered food.

    Now my son’s father owes me over $4000 in interest even though the original order is paid in full. So think about how long he didn’t pay his support to accrue that much in interest on a $67.00 a week order. He owes this money to me not the state. I was never on welfare so the interest goes to me not the state.

    Now my son’s father wants me to waive the interest now. Why should I do this considering for years my husband and I supported our son? I realize everyone has hard times but for 18 years? His answer, he has another family. Not my problem. He should have stepped up to the plate when his oldest son needed it.

    Now he refuses to pay. I believe I have to take him to small claims court because it’s not child support but interest. So apparently, I have to pay to take him to court once again because he’s still the dead beat he always was.

    You won’t believe this!
    My husband and I have been married for 13.5 years. When we married, he had a 5.5 year old son from a previous relationship. After we got married, my husband went down and voluntarily set up child support payments for Jr. because he loves him and wanted to help provide for him. My husband has always paid his support and is only $600 in arrears (due to having lost a job over the summer). He is ordered to pay $300/month in support. So, my husband being the responsible person he is, decided to not only get 1 new job but 2 so that he could make up for what he had missed paying. What do you think happened? Now both jobs are taking out $300/month for his child support and he just received a notice that they are going to begin taking out another $25/week to pay off his arrearages! So now, Sr. is on the hook for over $700/month for a $300/month support agreement on a 19 year old man that Sr. hasn’t seen for over 8 years because Jr.’s mother forbad it. For you New Jerseyans out there, beware! There is NO cut off age for child support in New Jersey. Child support continues no matter what until someone goes to the supreme court and has it cut off! Tell me, how can we get a lawyer when Sr. is paying 225% child support? We called an attorney firm for help and the first question they asked is “How do you plan to pay for an attorney?”. Sr. hung up. We make too much money to get Legal Aid (not that we see much of the money). We need help. If an attorney could help us get the support stopped, then we could pay some after the fact. But we have zero money up front to pay for a lawyer. We can’t even afford food and are about to be evicted through no fault of our own. My husband is working 60-70 hours a week and only brings home $225/week. This is utterly ridiculous! Somebody Help Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jr. needs to be emancipated! We filled out the paperwork and faxed it in but that was 6 months ago and nothing has been done about it yet. We have been told that Jr. can’t be emancipated unless we go to court with a lawyer.

    My brother in law has been paying arears for some time now and his ex wife has never spent a penny on the 2 sons which can be proven, but my question is now that the sons no longer live with their mother can he (brother in law) just pay the arears to his sons

    Deadbeat Dad…ha…more like Deadbeat MOM!
    Ha! It isn’t always ‘DEAD BEAT DADS’ that owe arears. My husband was never married to his ex. They had a child and lived together for 5 years. His ex didn’t even have a job. She stayed at home with the kid, in his house that he paid for. He worked his tail off during those 5 years. He bought all the formula, diapers, clothes, etc. When he left her (she cheated on him), she went to establish child support and slapped 5 years of arears on him. Yep…$17,000 back child support he owed from the start since they weren’t married and child support had never been established. The court respresented her; however, not him. He didn’t have the money to get a lawyer (he was in his early 20’s and trying to raise his family). So, $17,000 he owes. His child is now 18 and he still owes $14,000 of arears. So, don’t think that every man that owes is a dead beat dad. Oh yeah…guess what, the ex found out she was pregnant about a month ago (by her current husband) and took my husband back to court to increase the child support for the 18 year old (still paying because he is in high school). Guess what…it worked. Lazy, crazy ex’s. Be smart people! Do a DNA test and establish paternity ASAP if you have a child out of wedlock.

    Not all Moms are greedy
    Some states won’t slap the father with back support when you go to court for a child support order. I live in MA. I didn’t take my son’s father to court until my son was almost 3. I didn’t ask for back support because we were together prior to the court date. I didn’t even ask for back support, I just wanted support to help as my son grew older. He did not pay once the order was established. That is how he got at one point over 20,000 in arrears.

    confused and want to help my dad.
    My dad was arrested on the 3rd for felony back child support. My sister and I are now 25 and 22. We understand that he owes this money to our mom but she really doesnt deserve it. My dads bail is 16000 dollars no 10% no bondsman.My sister and I want to write off what my dad owes. My mom failed to say anything to friend of the court when we were younger that when i was 16 cps removed me out of my mothers home and I was put in a friends home but my dad still had to pay support but why not my mom? When I was 14 I lived with my dad and my step mom but he still had to pay support for me and my sister who was still at my moms. My sister moved out of my moms house when she was 16 but my mom did not report that to friend of the court and my dad still had to pay all this and his arrears still kept climbing. My mother never used the child support money on my sister and I. She got disability and worked under the table. She had everything she wanted. Well now my sister and I want to help my dad. Please any advice will help.

    totally not fair
    to compare, if you had a credit card and owe 1000 on it, the 1000 doesnt go up. but according to child support laws if you owe 1000 a month ot whatever you owe then go out to get a extra job, the 1000 now turns into 1300 or more depending on the new income! this isnt just theft its intentionally ruining any possible remedy to pay off debts……
    there’s a big difference in child care vs support. these outrageous laws make people support mostly the women and when i say support i mean its an income. not a care giving support but an real income to where there chiks can actually lay back, quit there job and let the child support come in in the mean time not letting the kid see there dad… evil to the highest levels is what this is…

    Would the state pay off child support arrearages to the custodial parent?
    I read online that some states would pay off child support arrearages to the custodial parent as a settlement. Is this true?

    I think a lot of you people don’t get the concept of child support. So let’s put it in a different perspective. If I lived with you. . And owe you rent. But I for some reason don’t want to or can’t pay my rent. Im ordered to pay but I don’t… so I live in your house for 18 years. You pay for all my food supplies. But then I move out. Does that mean I don’t owe you anything anymore. I mean I know you did it by your self. Paid all the bills but I moved out now. I shouldn’t have to pay for all those years of food and broard right. It’s the same concept. You’re not paying your adult children. You are paying her back for sacrificing all she did to feed those kids by herself while you went on and lived your own life.

    If I had no children. I could live in a one bedroom apartment. Spend half the amount owe in utilities . I can travel more often for work and have free time to spend with my buddies I could afford a new car and trips. But I’m a costodial parent with no help. I have a 3 bedroom house in a nice neighborhood so my kids are safe and comfortable. I pay a lot for childcare because I need to work full time. Instead of hanging out with friends I come home cook dinner. Help w home work. Wash laundry and shower the kids. Instead of a nice vacation I buy your child her favorite toy cause she did good in school. Spend money on giving then a nice birthday party and extra cash so she doesn’t feel left out cause she doesn’t have money for chips and soda. I haven’t received child support in 5 years. He is unemployed.

    child support
    Can some one help me with this i live nj and have a baby mother in the state of florida she filed for child support in 2009 and they went back to when the child was burn in 1997 now the mother applied in 2009 that only 5 years of child support i should owe why the hell is florida messing with me i filed for appeal and they told me the florida stutes wasdone tords 1997 guidelines since the child was born in 1997 guidelines ithink there playing me out but i might need to get a laywer in florida for 1,500 to save 20,000 k or they are going to screw me like the jugde already did i just don;t believe it she took me in 2009 it shows on documitation paper work it states that in 2009 she did take me……need help on this….

    A Bias System
    This system is a bias system and built to destroy the unknown, whether it’s men, women and/or children, someone has to become the target mainly men using them as a CASH COW to fund the Child Support Agencies…At best, the courts keep both parents at adversary, fighting etc, so they can keep one thing going is MONEY! To answer anyone’s questions Please stop “calling men deadbeats”… Why don’t the Mother’s as known as the “Custodial Parent” just give the child to the Father’s, in other words the money the father would have paid to mom, let him keep since he seems to be the elected one who’s ordered to pay for child support. I think this is fair for both parties.. The key word, we are in the best interest of the child as the court alleges right??? I’m a mommy and when I don’t have money to give to my children or pay for something I’m not charged 10% interest for not supporting my children…..Like I said, this system is bias to the unknown and we as American citizens must act now to help save our children, women and men! AMEN!!!

    if the father lives in the area and hte children spend 50% of their time with him then there is very little need for child support. So if the father just was a father chances are no issue

    family court or civil court
    looking for some answers if possible. My husband has a 25 year old son who has not lived with the mother since he was 15. Mother moved to another state and the child did not like it out. therefore came to live with the father for a while. At some point the child left his dads to live where he grow up at. Without either one of his parents. Around the age of 20 or so, the son moved in with us and wanted a car therefore the father decided to get him a car with the understanding that he will have his mother sign documents stating the arrears have been satisfied. Son got the car in which we paid 10,000.00 down for it plus insurance etc. Made monthly car payments. Yet the son will not have the mother sign documents. We have proof of all monies given to the son, is there way to file a case with family court to reflect this amount was paid because the case has been closed and the outstanding balance with no interest is owe in which is only arrears. Family court or civiil court? I ask about ciivil court because this his damage our credit his driver license etc???

    child support
    I was paying child support up until I couldn’t afford to pay anymore because i was unemployed for two yrs and paying out of my unemployment checks and i told my ex husband that it will eventrully stop. so i made a last payment back in Sept of 2013 and then in jan we went to court and he knows i dont work nor have income and epects my boyfriend to pay which he wont and should not have to at all. However, now i owe 896 which is more then what i know i owe and i paid 40 from a credit card never do that again though they charge fees which is nuts. but intrestd is crazy too why are being charge intrested if cant afford as is to pay back what is owed the law needs to change. I am not working still looking and going back to school. while my ex lives off of my kids ssi money and he works and has section 8 and food stamps and his finace lives with him and she works as a teacher and his brother lives there. I feel im getting the short end. he forced me out of my own when we lived togetgher by bring his finace in and told lies about me and i went into depression. i mean really do i have any say or something .

    so angry
    My husband is backed up arrears on adult children and domestics makes sure he’s paying it. Despite losing his job and having a baby of our own. All money goes to HER. Meanwhile he helps me take care of three children from a previous relationship who was once backed up just as much but the state dropped it because “they don’t feel like beating a dead horse” please explain to me while one man must pay for adult children him and his family were not allowed to see while I receive no support for three children that actually need support!!!???

    child support enforcement
    Its funny to me how court controls and turns a civil matter into a criminal matter. I have a paper signed by both parties stating no child support be ordered from either party i had 2 of 3 children. 3 yrs later one boy turn 18 moved n 2nd boy moved back to moms and immediately i get a suspended cdl license saying i owe 10,000 in support bullshit. Then order a mediation to dissolve money owed,”. So it was auctioned to 7000.00 4 yrs later i get a paper today gonna screw w my cdl.hunting n fishing licenses..the judge states he never saw agreement? My fault? Im filing a lawsuit against the state of indiana, or there gonna move this to a higher court. There choice. I dont owe these communist vastards anything!

    Child Support is not in the best interest of the children.
    11 years ago I was told I owed child support for a 12 year old child in California. A child I did not know existed. They charged me with $29,000 of welfare debt this child had used. So the day I found out I had to pay child support, I started out more than $30 in arrears. First of all that is injustice. I spent the next 10 years paying child support, child support arrears and interest on the original $29,000. They have received over $100,000 from me towards this $29,000 debt yet the debt is now $59,000 due to the extorted interest charges. The child is now 23 years old. May or may not be my biological child and no money is due to the custodial parent. During this entire time, I was a single parent, raising a child by myself without support. My son is now 21 and moved out a couple months ago. He went without growing up because of the child support demanded in California for a child I had never met. According to the state of California, when I asked for a paternity test, it is in the best interest of the child that you are legally the father. What a bunch of crap. The child support system is complete and utterly unjust. Whoever invented it, should be ashamed of what they have done in the name of children’s best interest. The only reason the mother named me as the father was to continue abusing the welfare system. I was an easy target since I hadn’t lived in California for years. Does my home state (Indiana) help me? Not a chance. They could care less. The lawyers here tell me to go to California and fight it. The California lawyers simply take my money and do nothing. So continue ranting about how you can’t support your child by yourself. If you can’t then you have not tried hard enough. I did and I still paid the ridiculous child support obligation. Stop living off “the system” and get off your lazy butt and support your own child.

    The truth
    The truth about support is that the support amounts are too high. When one parent has custody, they should not expect to get money for bills and utilities and so forth. C S is NOT alimony. If the non-custodial parent is getting nearly $1000 monthly, we all know that the child is not getting it, and even if they did they could not spend it without blowing it away. It is really a shame to try to break one parent, just because the other got the rights to a child, and possibly isn’t even the best parent to boot.

    It is sad to hear all of the NCPs complaining about having to support thier kids. CS payments are calculated based on what it costs to raise a child and usually it costs much more.

    Re “the Truth”: the real truth is that you should crawl back into your hole where the courts left you and try and support your kids however you can LOSER.

    The truth
    Exactly what u said Joe Blow.

    CS payments should be based on what it takes to raise a child, but they are not. Take my case for example. I have 7 kids. 6 live with me, and 1 that does not, that I pay support for. My monthly support for her is $674. She gets absolutely none of that, yet her mother has a new car, new home, and a guy that hasn’t worked for about 8 years. I buy all school clothes and pay for all activities such as cell phone, pet care, etc… I even tried to let it be, but it’s sad to see her not have the things that she should because her mother uses Child Support money to satisfy herself and my child could just rot in hell for all she cares. It’s very sad. I can not get custody because, in FL u have to show an endangerment to the child.
    Most CS receivers are probably good. But there are some horrible ones out there that really make this system stink. And a lot of people with squinted eyes that see things only their way such as you.
    I was told by the CS officer myself that the state only recognizes the children on support, not the ones that I have in my home. And if my daughter actually got some of it, I wouldn’t mind so much. I even hear my other children saying they feel sorry for her.
    So when u, Joe Blow, go get your CS goodies, how much goes into your pocket? How much does it take to raise a kid, really? Does everything given go to the child and nothing gets scraped off into your hands. I highly doubt it.

    That money is for the children. Not to help you with your lights and utilities unless you’re charging your child rent and such. Enjoy your new hair-do. Make sure to ask you’re kid if the like it being that they paid for it.

    You’re an idiot. I’m pretty sure light bills etc. are higher when there are children in the home vs just a single person. I’m sure you wouldn’t need more than a one bedroom home if you didn’t have children. Those things cost more when you have children. So yeah, child support covers those things (necessities).

    I must be living in a different world then every one else. I as a mother have been struggling to get child support for years. My ex owes over 10,000.00 in back support. Hes never haf his license taken away, files his taxes abd gets every dime. Ive tried to reason with him and have him only pay half and call it fair. He wont stay caught up with my 16 year old with support. Ive had to work three jobs to support my kids. Hearing dads complaining about having to pay child support its your duty as a parent we shouldnt have to do it on our own!!

    Child support in the state of Ohio is considered reinversement for money already spent. It even states that in the court order. I am not sure if it’s like that in every state, but the mother can spend the money anyway she likes. If your kids are going without then take her to court or call cps. Child support is based on the amount to support a child ( which is calculated low in my state IMO) and each party pays a percentage based on their income. If you think its too high request a modification. If all of this bugs you then I suggest waiting until you are in a long term relationship that is healthy before having anymore kids.

    My ex is only required to pay $20 a week. You people complain about only getting $60 or so. Its not to pay your bills its to help your child.

    My ex doesn’t pay he just lets them take his tax check every year. And when I get it I buy our daughter clothes, a few toys she wants, and I put some in her piggy bank. Of and I use two hundred (of the almost $100 a year i get) to pay for four weeks of summer camp at the ymca.
    I am remarried and have three other children (4 total) and we get by just fine without my ex paying. Does he owe it yes. But in my opinion in today’s world don’t have a baby if you cant afford one alone.

    After a child is 18 yes you should still owe your back support. You decided not to pay it. Your fault.

    Ex is asking for arrears and we had a verbal agreement for a different amount
    I got divorced while in the military in GA. We had a verbal agreement that she would take a different lower amount, she signed and cashed every check. She is now through Michigan asking for the remainder of the amount. She is not allowing me time with my children. I want to fight her on the back childsupport, but am not getting any help finding out what I need to do, what forms, etc… I have callled the base, no help, I called the co court, no help. I cannot afford a lawyer, any advice?

    When the noncustodial parent owes arrears and it is court ordered and it has been paid, whose responsibility is it to stop the payments from coming in….Non custodial or custodial (the one receiving the payments).

    I live in Michigan and I am divorced. My children are now adults and my ex owes me (not the state) almost $60,000.00. He is paying on the arrearages which is court ordered at $203.00 monthly. Shortly after divorce my ex husband had a baby with a woman (who has been on serious drugs for years, even overdosed 3 or 4 times) their child together is 16, the mother receives a great deal of child support for this child. Not to mention that she resides in the community shelter at times while receiving support payments from my ex husband and her current husband who she is separated from. I just think it’s so unfair that my kids have had to go without due to this child….I’m aware that the child has needs, but seems like mines got the short end of the stick when this child came along. I just would like to get what’s owed to me because my kids really got the short end of the stick with support from their father. Also why would the community shelter allow people to stay there with income? Women/men should not get Child Support if they aren’t using it wisely, providing a home, food, clothing and expenses for child welfare. I personally would like my arrearages increased to recoup money from my ex husband.

    1 to 80 Life span
    You will never pay this child suport back min wage want let you even have a place to live for your self along with child support you will most likly end up a drinker or drug addict in jail sick stressed out. this is a big part of the reason the jails and prison are full in the of Arizona and its not like the state cares about the children anyway a law should be made for ]the mother or father could agree to sign off these payment so the kids can build a relationship up for the grand children if we were paying to the mother or father without the state in it there would be no intrest there wouldn’t be no one in jail ether way it goes tax payers still pay for both and we pay taxes as well just sems to be a set up to 90 years old you would still be paying because of the state and they no thay will never get that money to work hard and end up with no money to live on not many is going to that sso people sell drugs to your kids that work for the state and the ones that go to college to make a living off there addiction why don’tthey just make up a law for the perfect fathers that are supporting there children but cheats or mother cheats have them pay cheats support for ever bet that falls on many that made up these laws and more then half of people paying these child support are most likly from broken homes disfunctional familys aqbuseed children that became adults that had no clue on how to be a father or mother so just because thay had to go to the state for help it cause you just like college does because the ones that go to the stae for help most likly had no educations or they would not have put the state in there busy and thhe state seems like a long shark because it had been studyed how give benifits and charge the person much more thin what they give out and this is all over America what happen to forgive my dedt America is in dedt plays big role how this work makes people lives missery and the kids America cant even get a raise if thay say you must still pay why cant African Americans get the blood and sweat that help build America plus intrest sure would be the big pay back because that would be just blacks its whites indian that were related as well but no thay won,t talk about that it would be to mach like right money is the root of all evil but God will change it there are people that see whats going on in America

    Chid suport
    You knw its to bad that you have to live this way in life hate toward the mother or father. I never grew up with my mother or father and i’m 51 years of age and I never received any suport from mother or father but I still honer my father and mother as it says in the bible but people change things and in life you can get confused and you end up hating your mother or father and it make your life much harder them people braught up with there parents the college school books tell you that and those are the most people paying child support. My mother and father divorce when I was a year old Father took another wife and had children and they wanted for nothing me onn the other hand wore hand me downs mother was 18 when she had me now should I be bitter and ask for my child support payback for 51 years if they would give me that I could my child support now my kids are grow to. I was braught by my great grand mother in a shack that a white man in Mississippi my great grandmother work for many years ironing cloths nd clean there house with no biniffits so she only got a little money so she had to get 30 dollers a month for me and my brother to feed us the cheap white man she work for let her have free in the exchange for willing for so many years like back in slavery time until the the kids got grow and he got old thet told her she had to move now they wanted buld a big house where we lived and the old raggdy shack had to go. Jobs seem the sazme way like my great grand mother use to work right today no maidical no pennsion she got for working for that man but he had plentty and the children lived a good life but not share with the good worker company in America is still just like that white man my great grand mother work for are we realy moving forward or are we going back to slavery but with every person not the just black American like during slavery time. How can you pay child support working at a place that don’t give you beniffit that force you to go to the goverment for help and they get tax write offs it does not seem fair catch 22 evry where talk about be honest. this causes hospital to fill up causes people to get sick with worry on how to pay the builds then the company go give to charties for tax write off but want pay there employee enough to live on or maidical aid so yes you would be in dedt paying child support when the child is adult and may not have a relationship while you are paying and you are being judged by state and has been dinost to be adhd or some other disorder and charge you for not knowing how to be a supporting father because of your problem you can only do certain job so if you don’t work thay put you in jail because you can’t function on the job without getting fired yes to me child support is a confusing thing I never recieved any child support so how would I right but I do believe there should be some change we should be able to be forgiven by our children and the state exspecially if the children are adult a second chance with the grand kids should be granted because you may spend a lot time feeling giltty for not being able to support you children or hAVE RELATIONSHIP WITH THEN FOR WHAT EVER REASON OR PROBLEM YOU MAY HAD IN THAT POINT AND TIME. PEOPLE TEACH FORGIVENESS ODES THAT NOT GO FOR THE STATE OR GORVERMENT AS WELL SO MAY THAT WANT BEFORGIVEN IS THAT HOW WORKS OR IS THAT WHY THAY TAKE gOD OUT OF POLITICS WHO KNOWS.

    Child surport
    Anyone who get caught up in child suport is going to have a hard time unless you have a good understanding with the mother for the kid sake. other than that its a headch dealing with what thet do with the money give to a boy friend that don’t work give him a plce to stay for how ever long he stays there and try to plAY DADDY HAVING disfunction from his mom and dad its seem that how it works and it has been that way for sometime untill you here some story on tv HOW A FEW PEOPLE HAD SUCCESS THAT WAS ON WAREFARE BUT NOT A BIG MASS OF PEOPLE WE ARE THE LAST NEVER FRIST i’M NOT SAYING YOU ARE NOT TO SUPPORT YOUR KIDS YES YOU SHOULD BUT IN MANY SITUATION IT HARD TO, AND THE COURTS GO BY THERE GUILDE LINES AND THAT IT. aND TO CHANGE ANY THING IS HARD IN THE WHITE HOUSE AND IT SEEM LIKE ITS GETTING WOIST THEY JUST GO TO MEETING AND DEO NOTHING AT TIME i HAVE SEEN THING HAPPEN IN A LONG TIME THE THE WHOLE aMERICA CAN SAY THANK GOD THE GOVERMENT DID SOMETHNG GOOD FOR THE LAND OF THE FREE ARE WE REALY FREE.

    I’m still paying off child support arrears for my adult child. When will it stop?
    Just speak to your son, and ask him to relive you. He will need to say that he paid you in full, and that he no longer wants to receive the money from you. Or he can send the check back to you when he receives it, and you still look really good on the court order!

    Believe in the law just not the justice system
    Back in 1995 my wife divorced me 3 months after div was finale she was with child, she called all worried didn’t,t know what to do, her mom , who is no longer with us suggested aborting, when my ex told me I told her that I would take responsible and be the father of the child.

    I was still in love with her figured this was what The Lord want it so we got back together had the child, my name was put on brith certificate every thing was going to work out right WRONG, she went back to the biological father without me knowing, letting my son be with bio dad at age three, I found out son knew about his real dad when he move in with me at the age of 14,
    I failed to mention that I have a daughter who is biologically mine she is 4yrs older than my son.

    FYI ex wife’s boyfriend was her first, he was a hell raiser that rather do that instead of having full time job, guess that’s where I came in to the picture. Honer dis from Seabees work everyday since,
    So a guy thing didn’t like my ex wife’s boyfriend then meet him in person last year at court

    This story can go for a long time bottom line when my son moved in at 14 I had rules at the house, he had to do chores, and go to school and after he got to school he was busted for pot, new rules no drugs, started having him do a UA test, he stoked my truck went driving thru his school, grounded right NO his mother called him to go with bio father to wyo to help put motor in his half brother motor cyl
    When he finally got back to colo he dicided that he would be better off with his mother,NO rules.

    No child support with court was never est since he came after the fact, but always paid more than was set for my daughter support

    Son drop out of school at 14 work full time all this didn’t know when ex took me to court for child support after she started running out of money helping her boyfriend dicided it was time for metro pay
    Lawyer cost me 25000 was to be a slam dunk case he told me a year went bye with motions after motions with finally a court date just so my lawyer half way tell me we need to settle cause good change we could loose so came up with me paying and bio dad paying I had to pay more cause my disability pay is more than his.

    Well last week after I found out that my son at17 was pulled over and had pot in the car,pulled over again same day,so I filed a motion with Elbert county court to modify child support, she went to her lawyer said that my reason to modify was unjust because being 18, working full time and having enough money to buy drugs doesn’t justify a reason for modifying child support had to pay her lawyer

    Sorry needed to talk, know this is confusing story, it is hard to believe that the justice system allows this,cause when she put her financial statement together, she works 30 hrs a wk has done two additions on her house,2008 SUV that is paid for has little debt
    And only makes 11 dollars an hour

    Darn I stared this letter cause she had my ss garnish saying I was behind when in fact I am ahead, it is a pride think cause a have been raised to be a man of my word and do what is right only to be screwed

    Paying on CS Arrears 25 Years plus
    My husband had a brief affair with a woman and fathered a child who is now age 38. His mother, soon married another thereafter and lived on welfare often throughout his upbringing. My husband paid the court ordered child support all but possibly two of the years when he was out of work. He has paid faithfully and even though did, the state would still step in and garnish his wages for double or more the court ordered CS amount required. THis has gone on for the 28 years we have been together. In 2006 he became permanently disabled with chronic heart failure and has not been well. His fixed income on disability is meager, yet the state steps in and garnishes over 10% of disability as well. He has paid child support and then some now for a total of going on 39 years! He has paid more than triple his original obligations and yet they still have a Judgement/Lein against our property for yet another 20,000!!! I am so disheartened about this and wish to pursue the advice of an attorney to help him with this situation but my husband is afraid of rocking the boat for fear they will make things even harder. I don’t see how they can make it harder.

    I am currently paying child support and my child will be 19 in Feb. I am currently paying arrears.I didnt know if there is a form I am supposed to file so that the child support stops for the one 19 and goes directly to the arrears. Please help.

    collectionfs of arrears upon Emancipation of minor child
    My child mother moved to bay county in florida I live in orange county in florida have been paying child support since 9/2010. the child has graduation from high school 2014/june. six months later was 18years old in 10/2013. I paid child support in bay county with the arrears and now they want 26,000 but what happen they are two different counties so now they are doing a audit right now which they should have done. guess what the other county don’t talk to one another check that out. so this is bad they need to stop that bay county got my child support, arrears, sent me a termination letter that says arrears -0-, child support -0-. so there is a problem they do not want to get in touch with the other county they did not want to look at my paper work from bay county

    My son’s father stopped paying his child support for years . I just watch it built up . He goes on FB and boasts about his new tattoos yet still my husband and I are struggling to take care of our family. One day he will pay. My son will go off to college next year and still no child support payments.(He who feels it knows it).My case is in NY so he has to pay until the age of 21. So no I don’t feel sorry for deadbeat dad’s He was always able to see his son even though he never took care of him they way he should have. My husband is paying support for his three children and taking care if his son too, why can’t he pay his support.

    my youngest turned 2 and no longer lives at home goes to college full time using my tax info of course and now have a court date to stop support which is fine i have no issue with that i havent gotten suport on a regular basis even hen the older two children were oin school. The father ows thousands in arreas, should he still hve to pay them, im willing to let the kids have them, knowing i did everything for all three when support wasnt being paid.

    Any ideas plz and ty

    child support sucks for non custodial
    My husband is still paying child support and kids are grown adults 21&19. they never even benefited from the support when they lived with their mom as teens cuz they would still ask their dad for more money as well as their grandparents. the ex only worked part time or didn’t work at all according to the kids but enjoyed going to bingo and leaving two teen girls alone to their own vices, allbeit not bingo everyday but enough. they never wanted to live with us cuz they knew dad had rules, curfew and they didn’t like the idea so since they could choose, they stayed with their mom. till this day, mom paints their dad as reason they got divorced even though she was the one shacking up with different guys. yet when my husband went to check on misapplied payments his case worker lumped him into group of inmates who can’t or don’t pay for their support even though he’s paid half of it off already with the help of EIC from our daughter that she never benefits from.

    I cannot believe the nonsense I’m seeing on here. Basically, you think you can not pay the custodial parent then when the child turns 18, you STILL don’t have to pay? Well, when exactly do you have to support your child? This is really pathetic. First of all, your debt does NOT stop until it’s paid. Period. Just like a mortgage, rent, car payment and student loans. Second of all, the NCP had to compensate for your lack of support for years, therefore you owe the money to her/him not the child. If you were so concerned about money going directly to your child, you should have been sending money when the child was younger. Your issue isn’t where the money is going, it’s the fact that you actually have to pay it. As for everyone that’s complaining about the children living with them and still having to pay, the very moment the family dynamic changed, you should have went to the court and modified the order. Really nobody’s fault but your own. And FYI, Child Support Enforcement collects a fee FROM THE CUSTODIAL PARENT every year, in VA it’s only $30. Which is a small price to pay for the services they have to provide because a lot of men won’t pay any other way. Whats even more sad is that the deadbeat parents make it hard for the guys that are really being taken advantage of. It’s hard to distinguish between the two. No, CS doesn’t work for everyone and like any system, it has its flaws and people that take advantage. But if every man/woman would take care of their children without being told to and every NCP would do the right thing, there’s be no need for it. And also to the girl that commented that her child gets $65 a month and she doesn’t care about anything else, either you’re working very hard to take care of your child which is great but the father should work just as hard. Or more likely, we’re all making up for the father’s lack of support with the food stamps, checks and assistance that comes from our taxes. And for the girlfriends/spouses of the deadbeat fathers, you’re just as disgusting as they are. If it was your child, you’d be complaining. But to expect a man to support the children you have together plus any your had previously but are so up in arms about them being required to support the children he had BEFORE you is pathetic. If all you women would stop reproducing with KNOWN deadbeats, maybe the cycle would end. I have children and I work very hard to take care of them with the help of my husband who is NOT the bio father of my children. I am owed child support. I don’t expect to ever get it but I would love to be able to put more away for college. If my husband was anything like these “fathers” I saw on here, I would never have glanced his way. Why would you ever have children with someone that you KNOW hasn’t supported their children in years? Everybody has a sob story but nobody takes responsibility for what they/their partner owes.

    I am paying arrears for a daughter who is married and has children of her own because I had a son that died when 7 years old and when I finally got my head straight after his death I went to child support about the amount of child support I was paying and they said the original order was written for 2 children and that is what I was ordered to pay. Not only that I thought we had 3 children before the court order(and I was paying for three) to find out that one was not even mine. I never was reimbursed for that amount either. But I’m still paying for a child that died in 1997. I had a period I was sick and had no job. My back was broken and that’s how the arrears came about. So tell me how to handle this situation.

    Getting screwed by the state
    I had paid my child support for 8 10 yrs of $1259.00 a month for 3 kids i got fired from my job and can’t find work and tried to lower my income… The dcs says i should be able to find a job and still wants me to pay 290 a month. But before they changed it , it has built up to 14,590 something… And is still continuing to grow… They want to take everything they can to punish me even tho i have been looking for work and have been on interviews… They don’t care… It’s all about their money…
    If you have been screwed by dcs or the court please email me at. FathersHaveRights@yahoo.com
    Let’s try and change the system.

    I need advise. My dad has been paying arrears forever. My mom died two and a half years ago and he told me he was still paying. When I asked my moms widower about it, he said that he never sent a death certificate to stop the payments. He has over $8000.00 of my dads money. What can be done?

    Courts and child support arrears
    Im not wasting time on bitch,n we all know how unfair this system is. What needs to happen is organization. A strong coalition of hard working non custodial parents,or anybody who believes in a democratic process, without this were all doomed to fail, and people need to be heard. Amendments drawn up and submitted to HHS,ccs, family courts ect,ect,ect. I know it won,t be easy. A website,or Facebook to collectively from people who want to be representive in the same mind set. We,ll let me know what your options are. I am sure with the right support we can win a place were we all can be heard. Dennygreensog@yahoo.com

    I am amazed at how many non custodial parents think they shouldn’t have to pay child support or arrearages. Did you have them children?? Honestly, I am one of those women that raised my three children on my own until I met their stepfather. The sperm donor went on about his business and actually had 6 more kids. I am so sick of hearing poor me has to pay 200 and something a month! How much do you think it takes to raise a child?? Hell that doesn’t even begin to cover anything. School lunches, clothes, activities and so on. Count yourself lucky you are getting away with only paying that much. BTW, that is based on a minimum wage job so surely you can do that. Every person that has to pay child support cries the system sucks, they just want my money… HELLO… no your money is going to pay for YOUR child or children!! Stop whining, get off your butt and pay what you should pay!!!!!!!!!!!

    Hard Working Mom
    I’ve gone to college while raising my sons and working two jobs. I paid for rent, utilities, clothing, food, medicine, activities, child care, etc… I was up with sick, cuddling with sad, and celebrating the awesome. If the only thing a parent has to do is pay a small portion of the cost and can’t keep up, then guess what; you owe them until you pay them your “fair” share!

    Why does the state make a man a slave to child support, and then call him dead beat, when his rights as a human are denied? I don’t agree with the state, that is making child support a business that they are benefiting from from, we need to stand up against this! After the children are grown and have children up their own,and they treat you like you owe them something. Wouldn’t this be considered as EXTORTION.

    Your human rights are to pay for the child that YOU helped bring into this world. You are being denied nothing. If you paid your child support when they were kids, this would not be an issue. Grow up and be a man. You are simply reimbursing the custodial parent that picked up the slack because you probably didn’t want to pay, and most likely struggled to provide for him/her without your help. JUST because your child is 18 now, you think you are washed free from all the years that you were a deadbeat? And yes, you sound and act like a deadbeat. If the shoe fits..

    My home should be mine!!
    Been married to my husband 27 years and have 3 boys ages 22, 18 and 14. Hubby was married less than 2 years which produced 2 children who are in their 30’s. Hubby pays arrears that come out of his monthly disability check which I don’t have a problem with. My problem is there is a state enforced child support lien on our home, which we own! We bought it with cash years ago. If my husband and I would die in a car wreck, who gets our home and property? Our kids or his kids? I mean it infuriates me that there is this lien on MY property!!!! I never hear anything about spouses like me out there!

    I am on Disability, Federal, not State. My support payment was $25.00 per child per month for two children.

    The $50.oo per month was my obligation prior to my receiving Disability. Once i was awarded SSD, my children became entitled to monthly entitlement payments on my earnings record. Thier mom however wouldn’t sign them up even after I notified her. so I kept paying the $50.00 each month out of pocket.

    Many YEARS (about 8) went by and then one day i got a letter telling me that I no longer owed child support. It turns out she finally did sign them up and each child now receives almost 300.00 each per month. Their entitlement on my earning record ends at age 18 or may continue for other reasons such as school in which case it will end at the age of 21. So they can receive benefits up to age 21 as long as certain conditions are being met.

    The child entitlements do not affect my own monthly award, but are in addition to that.

    I don’t know if this can help you as your circumstance is for arrears…….but others may find this helpful to them if their situation is similar to mine.

    Arrears not wanted
    My kids are grown and no longer care about the child support payments. Is their a way the payments can be stopped if they kids asked them to be?

    Your “arrears” are owed to your ex not your children. Your ex is the one who shelled out the money when obviously YOU weren’t paying. Your children’s opinions has no bearing on this subject.

    I am disabled recieving Social Security Disability and my 2 grown sons who are in their 30’s have taken me to court to have my disability check garnished to get child support. The judge gave them favor and called them minor adults ruling 360.00 a month. I thouhgt i would only be liable to pay arrears this is a case from 1994 their mother filed but now is deceased . My 2 sons want nothing to do with me but make my life miserable. I need help in putting a stop to this.

    Ha ha ha the system sucks, my support went from 1200 to 2000 a month, then I lost my job, the state is refusing to modify my order and expects me to find another job that paid as good as my last one, I’ve been forced to only apply for jobs that pay a similar amount…. needless to say I’ve applied for 300 jobs in 5 months and have had no luck, I can’t even afford to move if I got one of those jobs….. well with interest and arrears my debt compiled to more in 5 months than I’ve paid in 14 years. I also have students loans as well, when you add everything up plus taxes I was left with 20% of my income, and that was not including student loan payments or rent. The only option in this scenario is an all to cold one 1)the state works with you within reason 2)you are incarcerated 3)take your own life…. Currently I have a lean on a bank account with a negative balance, a license suspension, and threats of non payment and violating a court order leading to incarceration. Taking my own future into count and looking at this in a logical manner, balancing pros and cons, I’m opting for jail time, I’m homeless, living on assistance, and refusal by the DA to modify my order because of a change in circumstances. Did I mention that my child doesn’t live with her mother, yeah that would be an automatic warning for modification. If nothing happens, and nothing changes I will be spending a large amount of time in jail, after I’ve depleted a large amount of state funding for real criminals I’ll write a letter to everyone of my elected officials and throw a rope over a branch! Screw this world and screw this crazy machine that doesn’t factor any sense of logic into the equation!

    I have two grown sons 22 & 24 .There father owes over 37,000 in arrears. He is currently unemployed and paying $111. From his unemployment. He has filed a motion to stop paying due to our sons being adults and living on there own. I received the certified letter to appear at a hearing. I’m working part-time and I’m also married now. I’m missing work to appear at this hearing. Will the court rule in his favor.

    My credit report says my child support case has been closed. I am sure this is due to the fact that the child was moved from OK to TN over the summer. Will I still owe that amount? Will it be transferred over to TN? What will happen next?

    My wife left the house 17 years ago with my 5 year old son. She never notified me where they were. About 4 years ago I was hit with a garnishment of wages. Was never notified of a court date. Was not able to defend myself and was told I had to pay $1400 a month. is that legal? what can I do about that?

    Funny I hear a bunch of females (not women) on here calling dudes “dead beats.” So what happens when a spiteful chic takes a dude down to the courthouse and ask for support for the child and does nothing with the money to support the child? What happens when she has 2 more kids from another dude and is using the payments to support her 2 new kids? Is that fair to my child? See, I’m not in the arrears thank God. But all you females sitting around trying to punish the “LOSER” please do real MEN a favor and stop opening your damn legs to a LOSER. Lay down with a dog and you’re gonna wake up with fleas. If he is a loser then so are you for sleeping with him……

    How funny I just read this post and we both had the same “female” comment…lol…I swear I didn’t steal that from you. I skipped the last few comments because I was getting so mad.

    Wow!! Child Support is a major problem that needs addressed!

    I am a dad myself. My EX and I divorced after five years of marriage, (a divorce she wanted). At the time of divorce, we had two children. When we split, I had remained in the home with our kids. She temporarily moved in with her parents.

    At the time I was pending a SSD decision for disability. (Later, I lost the home having no way to pay with the 300.00 a month the state granted me to live on during SSD decision). I needed someone to watch my kids while i talked to an attorney so took them to my parents for the day. (They had just moved the month prior). When I arrived to pick them up and head back home the police where there.

    She had filed an order of protection citing that the kids were in danger and I wouldn’t let her see them and she didn’t know where they were. I however had never prevented her from seeing the kids at any time and they never were in danger! My only request was that she visit our kids in their current home, with supervision, until a court had made judgment. (I didn’t want her fleeing the state or country with our kids and this was the home she left!). In the meantime, I was looking into hiring legal counsel.

    LIke I said, The police showed up at my parents while I was gone and took our children in as wards of the state. They may have arrested me if it were not for a neighboring relative. I was in his vehicle at the time coming from seeing a lawyer myself! I slammed the lock home on the door of the car when the officer reached for the latch (stating that he was only trying to help me)! I had done nothing wrong however and wasn’t about to be taken into custody myself on bogus charges. The simple fact was that my EX had beat me to the punch and used a dirty trick to get immediate temporary custody of our children. My ex had used deceptive suppositions and blatant lies to have the children taken in as emergency wards. They police left with my mom and my kids, thankfully no charges were ever attached.

    A few weeks later, EX was awarded primary custody. My attorney had just moved to Utah and 911 had just happened. The judge had wanted another day to deliberate, but my attorney said he had to leave to drive back to Utah as he couldn’t fly as the planes were grounded. The judge was forced to deliberate without hearing the rest of my testimony and supporting evidence. It ended up that I was granted visitation rights and the judge entered the child support payments at $25.00 per child based on the fact I had relatively NO income.

    I tried to keep the home, The ex filed a quit claim, but I had to let it go to auction and ended up moving in with my own parents.

    Several years later, i was awarded full Disability, yet I kept being billed every month for child support from the state. Thankfully my parents had insisted on paying the $900.00 I had accrued in arrears and I was able to make regular payments from then on out and even pay them back.

    I tried to get social security to look into getting my children the entitlements for dependants, but they told me that was something my EX had to ask for. So, I told her about it, but she wouldn’t listen. She didn’t do anything about it, so I kept paying the $50.00 each month. Then, about 8 years later I got a notice in the mail that I would no longer have to pay child support as the children were now receiving SSD child entitlements. These entitlements are separate from my own SSD disbursements so they do NOT affect my income. Each of my children NOW are receiving $260.00 each a month!
    Why my EX didn’t do this sooner is beyond me. I can only supposition that in her mind, she was trying to make me suffer, but someone must have shown her her folly.

    So, to sum it up. I am Disabled on Social Security. My income is not affected. My children receive $210.00 more each month PER CHILD than my child support obligation. I still visit with at least one on a regular basis and he has even lived with me for a time where I was the one receiving the entitlement as his rep payee.. The other has a child of her own (my first grandson). My son is 17 and my daughter is 19, but she is still attending school. Entitlements end at 18 unless the child remains in school or on certain other conditions until age 21 at which time all entitlements end regardless.

    I am very thankful that things have worked out as they have. I can’t imagine paying huge sums of money for child support or having arrears that have interest that make the obligee a debtor for life. While it is hard not to have had the opportunity to raise my children the way I or God intended, I am grateful for the little bit of time and its impact I was able to have on their lives over the years.

    NOW. Here is what I think about child support. If a parent can’t make it on their own without the aid of another, then they DO NOT DESERVE TO HAVE THOSE CHILDREN.

    There are tons of single parents who raise their children WITHOUT any type of financial help from another adult or even state or government handouts. Child support is nothing but a way to stick it to someone else with the guise of benefiting the kids. If you can’t raise your kids without a handout, then give them to someone else who can. I know lots of people who if they had their kids instead of the EX, the kids would be better off, the EX would be better off and everyone else would too. There are lots of parents who don’t have custody of their kids who would if they had them NOT WORRY ABOUT CHILD SUPPORT. THEY WOULD SUPPORT THE KIDS AND TELL CHILD SUPPORT TO TAKE A HIKE.

    Child support is NOT necessary to raise a child. The only thing necessary is a parent that has enough morels to take responsibility for the choice to be that child’s guardian. Part of that choice is realizing that you have every day with that child when someone else does NOT.


    There are way too many people who have custody of their children and want other people to pay. This needs to end. I think that in cases where a person is granted primary custody, one of the FIRST THINGS A JUDGE SHOULD CONSIDER IN AWARDING CUSTODY IS IF THE CUSTODIAL PARENT WILL RAISE THAT CHILD WITHOUT CHILD SUPPORT FROM THE OTHER PARENT. IF BOTH PARENTS ARE EQUALLY RESPONSIBLE AND ABLE TO BE A PRIMARY CUSTODIAN, THE JUDGE SHOULD AWARD CUSTODY TO THE PARENT THAT DOESN’T WANT OR NEED SUPPORT TO RAISE THE KIDS. Then, the judge should issue a flat support of no more than $25.00 per child per month, of up to 4 children max regardless of income level of the non custodial parent making under $50,000.00 per year. The max any non custodial parent will have to pay is 100.00 per month TOTAL.

    I see lots of parents who get child support. In most instances, $25.00 is more than those children typically have spent on them monthly for ALL types of expenditure. The custodial parent typically would be paying for many of those services NEARLY EQUALLY anyways even without a child!

    The law says that you only have to feed, clothe and shelter your child. IT DOES NOT SAY IT HAS TO BE GOOD FOOD, DESIGNER CLOTHES OR A 6 BEDROOM HOME!

    Child Custody is a racket that needs to end. It causes far more damage to people than it solves. It makes CUSTODIAL PARENTS feel entitled when in fact the only entitlement they have is to take responsibility for being awarded custody and be happy that they have the kids in their life every day. That should be payment enough.



    NOPE. Child support should be $25.00 per month per child, up to 4 children, period, for anyone making less than $50,000.00 per year. $50.00 per month per child up to 6 children for anyone making over $100,ooo.oo per year. Thats it. END OF STORY. Everything else the custodial parent should FIND THEY ARE privileged to cover by the simple fact that they get to see their kids on a daily basis, make decisions for them and raise them as they see fit while the non custodial parent doesn’t.



    Newsflash: this policy was in place LONG before Obama entered the picture. It would be so nice to have one, just one, online discussion without someone throwing their personal political opinions into the mix. What Obama has to do with this conversation, I do not know. What I do know is that you sound ridiculous, like the character of Walter Sobchak in “The Big Lebowski” relating everything that happened in his life to when he was in Vietnam.


    I had my children late in my life, I was already in my early fifties when the youngest was born. I am now in my early sixties and my youngest is in her early teens. By the time she is 22 years of age I will be in my early seventies. After 9/11 I fell behind in my child support due to loss of employment. But the fact is that “it is only money” being far away from that human wreck that is the custodial mother(ex-wife) and living and enjoying my life free of the horror that only some women are able inflict is worth every dime that I pay in child support and any arrears that I have accrued. When I ride my Harley(that I had to give up when we married) to this horror of a human beings house to see my teenage daughter and she climbs on the back of the bike to go get some ice cream. I just cant stop smiling!!! Realizing that I will most likely die of old age before she sees all of the arrears money, its all I can do from laughing out loud.

    So guys “IT”S ONLY MONEY”

    My children father owes me 34,000 in arrears. He only pays 86.00 a month toward it. How ccan i geet it raised. He is on disability. I do not know if its SSi or what. Kids are grown. He never worked a job..just the system

    My children father owes me 34,000 in arrears. He only pays 86.00 a month toward it. How can i get it raised. He is on disability. I do not know if its SSi or what. Kids are grown. He never worked a job..just the system

    My question is if this truly is ‘child support’, then why isn’t the [now adult] CHILD receiving the money?

    From a fairness perspective, why are non-custodial parents required to reimburse the state for welfare that benefits BOTH the child’s mother and the child, which is actually Undifferentiated Family Support (a mixture of alimony and child support)?

    Then again, ‘child support’ is no longer about the parents providing for the children’s needs.

    It’s about increasing the gross amount of money collected by the state in order to increase the federal reimbursements the state receives under the Child Support Performance and Incentive Act.

    See this report for documtation (http://www.fathersunite.org/Child%20Support%20Incentive%20Abuse%20Report.pdf) and this website for an alternative (http://www.mediate.com/articles/if_they_can_do_parenting_plans.cfm).

    I have to say every situation is different. As a woman I can see the system is broken. I have two different perspectives.
    1. My dad left my mother in the worst possible situation. He had been cheating. We lived in TX. My mother was in a bad accident and got a settlement and used the money to put him through school. They decided he had a better chance at making more $ with an education than she did. He finished school while she worked as well, and all said and done they decided to move to California where he could get a better job. His elaborate plan included going to CA first to secure said job and housing, at which time he would send for us. Finally he called my mother and told her he was set with a great job and house. Sell everything (they rented in TX) so clothes, furniture, etc. We would be getting all new things. Send him the money and he will send plane tickets. Which she did and while she was waiting for the plane tickets he was clearing the accounts. He got the money and called her to let her know he “didn’t want to be married anymore”. Leaving my mom, brother and I virtually homeless and moneyless. Locating him in a different state was a challenge and it took years for her to get a divorce and child support order as one attorney general contacted another. What a heartless a$$. He should be made to pay. No doubt we struggled. We were poor. Very poor, my entire childhood, but we survived and I am stronger for it. My brother and I are both adults and the courts contacted my mom about settling the thousands and thousands owed in support. Which she did and good for her. I had kind of wished to see some of it, to maybe pay off some school loans, but I didn’t and I’m not mad about it.
    2. My husband had a child with a girlfriend (before we knew each other) when he was 18. He quit school to support his new family. Worked several jobs at once, and bought a house, two cars, and fully supported his girlfriend and child, so she could stay home with the baby. He worked his rear off for both of them and was only home to sleep. When he started moving up at one job he was able to leave the other and could be home more. During this time he realized that his girlfriend was not exactly maturing into her role as a mother. She often dropped off the child with grandma and partied and was spending more time and money running the roads than playing house wife. This led to arguing and an eventual breakup when the kiddo was 3 years old. Now we were friends during this time and let me tell you, I would not, especially considering my past experience be friends or ever dream of getting involved with a deadbeat dad. He paid her 20% of his pay from the time they split, without an order. He bought clothes, toys, food, paid for daycare as well so she could find work. She of course started using the kid as a tool for what she wanted and even admitted to using the money for pot. She went the attorney general when the child was 5 and was able to get back pay to birth with interest. The only amounts they would remove were checks that said “child support” in the notes, when he often gave her cash and fully 100% supported the child and her for 3 years. Huge back pay. To make matters worse she would often disappear with the kid or move unannounced. He still paid until he got into a massive car accident with an uninsured drunk driver and lost his job. It took a lot of time for him to get back on his feet and he had to change his line of work due to injuries. Where was our support. We had two kids, but we were married so, in it together for better or worse right… Not that he was making millions as it was, but was he a deadbeat to me and our kids? Hell no, of course not. Was he to her and her son? Oh you bet, money or you are $hit. Fast forward to now. He owes around $10,000 in support. We have 2 elementary age children together and he is still diligently paying back pay on an 18 year old. My income tax return which helps us support our 2 children goes to her for one that is grown. She also has 2 other children with another man who she never married and was supported by welfare and then married a 3rd man. Living nicely, collecting support from 2 different dads and married to another man.
    My point? Custody and support is not a one size fits all and it really should not be treated that way. Not all men that owe are deadbeats. Not all mothers have the best interest of the child. I honestly believe if someone has to prove support, the other party should have to provide receipts for the spending. Period. The government should get out of it. I had kids, I can support them. If I get involved with a man that doesn’t give a sh*t about supporting his kids, that sucks, but I would do what it takes to support them, like my mother did and you know what, that should be the dad’s loss. Some men are men some are snakes. Some women are women some are snakes. Do your best to pick a partner. Moms don’t use your kids as a paycheck. Dads don’t treat your kids like they didn’t happen. Government get out of the equation.

    I have paid child support for roughly 14 years and I got behind at one point due to circumstances beyond my control, which was roughly around year 6 or 7. I was behind 2,000 but the total ended up being 4,000. 2,000 in support and 2,000 in fees which did not got to my ex, it went to a corrupt system that was established by Hilary Clinton, who intern was being cheated on by her wonderful husband. So I am not surprised that there is little compassion for the non-custodial parent!!!!!

    How do I stop the interest accumulating on Child Support Arrears? I am making payments but and still getting farther behind. No progress even though I pay 50% of my paychecks for support.

    This is better than reality t.v.
    “My ex is a b….”
    It’s Obama’s fault…”

    Arrears are the result of falling behind on current child support orders due. Like with any loan or line of credit, if you fall behind there will be penalties and interest. If you want to avoid paying off the debt until the day you retire, stay current on the existing child support orders.

    My son has been paying back child support for years. TheTexas Atty General, years ago, made my son to pay $36,000 to his girlfriend, who was married when the child was born. She claimed my son was the father. To make a long story short. My son’s daughter, age 24, was killed on Jan 1, 2015 this New Years Day in Houston. My son went down to the Child Support Division in Victoria, Texas and they gave him a print out showing he had paid the amount ordered in full. It showed he was not in arrears. The mother is remarried and is still getting half of my son’s checks, even his unemployment checks. He lost his job last month and found a day labor job making $9/hr for one day. When he got his check, he had $40. $60 was sent to the mother of his deceased daughter. Now Child Support Division says he’s to pay an additional $46,000. How does he get this stopped? He paid her every cent that he was ordered to pay and now he has to pay more? His daughter is dead. He is so depressed right now he’s ready to just give up. He told me he’ll be paying Mary Alice for the rest of his life. When I went to the funeral, I noticed that his daughter did not look anything like my son. Her two sisters and her looked like they could pass for triplets’. I believe after seeing this young woman in her coffin, that she was not my son’s daughter. How does my son get this stopped? Thank you.

    The whole, why does the custodial parent get arrears and not the child or why, now that I have custody, do I still own arrears is stupid.

    Look at it this way:
    You own money to X to pay your part of bill Y. You don’t pay. She pays bill Y with her own money. She has now GIVEN YOU A LOAN. If she can’t pay the bill and uses public assistance to pay, you still own the money as you are still responsible for paying part of bill Y and when you don’t pay you are getting a loan as someone else pay your part for you. If the state pays your part to her on your behalf, you owe arrears to the State. If her PA was established when you were paying and she didn’t have it modified when you stopped you owe her for the loan and the arrears go to her.

    Make sense now?

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