I am in a pending divorce because my ex was having an affair. I don’t want the divorce, but feel I will lose custody of my son if I don’t file first. Our court date is set for September 24th 2009. The temporary custody orders gave us joint physical custody with my ex being primary and myself secondary. I currently pay my ex child support although she refuses to work.
I moved thirty miles away to Fort Smith, Arkansas, in the hopes of stopping our arguing in front of our three year old son. I have an apartment, car and new job, and have seen my son at least 48 hours weekly. She’s living in her mother’s house which was just sold on Monday, and now my ex has about seven weeks to find a new home. I feel terrible about this, but also think I would lose everything that I’ve gained by leaving her if I cancel the divorce at this point.
Further, I’ve asked for sole custody of our son because her past shows that she has been and is still currently unstable. She at one point stated that she wanted to work on our marriage and end the divorce, but I’ve since realized it was a play in the hopes of getting me to help her gain more stability in her life. She refuses to move in with me now, and won’t talk about our marriage without getting angry and arguing with me.
Do you have any advice for me?
Discuss with your Oklahoma licensed attorney, but generally you should stand your ground until she makes moves that look real. Your moving out of state, even though it is close, may have an effect and that needs to be discussed with an Oklahoma attorney. Do work on developing concrete evidence of her instability.
Erik H. Carter is a Senior Attorney of the Cordell & Cordell, P.C. office in Indianapolis, Indiana as well as the Litigation Manager of both the Indianapolis and Pittsburgh offices. Mr. Carter has practiced since 1993 as an attorney. He is licensed in Illinois, Indiana, Pennsylvania as well as the Northern District of Indiana and the Southern District of Indiana.