Only 20 percent of mothers not living with the father of their children are satisfied with dad’s performance, according to a survey released today by National Fatherhood Initiative.
Another disturbing trend the survey discovered is the vast majority of mothers believe there is a father absence crisis in America, but two-thirds of mothers think dads are replaceable either by mom or other men. Perhaps, the survey deduces, this is a result of more than half of mothers agreeing the media portray fathers in a negative light.
Let’s hear from the dads out there. What do you think of the survey findings? Is it right that the majority of mothers think fathers are replaceable?
The first-ever national survey took an in-depth look at how today’s mothers view fathers and fatherhood. The University of Texas Office of Survey Research conducted the survey of 1,533 mothers with at least one child in the home under the age of 18. The entire report is available for download at www.fatherhood.org/mamasays.
I think it is tragic that so many children grow up without fathers these days. First of all I think people get divorced far too often, most of that petty shit can be worked out if you’re both willing to compromise, and secondly if the marriage can’t be saved you’re both STILL parents! Except in cases of child abuse there is no excuse to keep children from their fathers!
I think the idea of the replacable father is a defense mechanism for most mothers (legaly and emotionaly). Ive seen several divorces (and been thru one as well) and thats the first thing I see come up “Mom is mandatory, dad is negotiable”. To me its mostly a tactic to sway custody opinion automaticaly in the favor of the mother. It puts the fathers on the defense from day one, and perpetuates the myth of the woamn are victims and the men are victors. As we get closer and closer to sexual equailty I think we have look at the fathers role alot closer, and not be so quick to dismiss them.
Fallacy
I believe that the survey may be correct as far as what women believe. However, I do not believe that is the case. Our society (and likewise court system) has placed such a large emphasis on the rights of the mother during divorce. It is believed that a father is just a figure that provides for his children monetarily and not necessarily in other ways. If this were true, fathers would be replaceable.
I believe that fathers are NOT replaceable. They offer many things to their children that cannot be provided by others. First of all, there is love. NO ONE can love a child like his true parents. Other factors to be included are psychological, emotional and social development. It is very important that a child experiences the things that BOTH parents provide. This experience provides the child with a well-rounded, firm view of himself/herself in the world they grow up in.
So Fathers, do not fall for the hype. You have every right (and responsibility) to provide for your child’s well-being and growth in ALL aspects of their lives. You are NOT replaceable.