Mother’s Day is difficult for divorced parents and it’s a situation a large chunk of the population has to deal with.
Although you’re no longer together, your ex-wife is the mother of your children and deserves appropriate forms of recognition on Mother’s Day.
You want to show your children you still get along, if only for the sake of civil parenting, and part of proving that is acknowledging Mother’s Day instead of avoiding the situation.
Navigating the Gift Situation
Do some careful maneuvering to pick out an appropriate gift. Should it come from you, or be labeled with your children’s names? Do whatever feels most comfortable.
Standard Mother’s Day gifts like flowers or chocolates are a safe bet, and are perfectly appropriate to send to an ex-wife for Mother’s Day. Companies like FTD will ship these items right to her door, making it less awkward for you.
You could also help your children pick out a personal gift such as a favorite movie, hobby supplies, or a gift card for her favorite restaurant.
If you have joint custody, you may end up taking care of your children when Mother’s Day rolls around. Make a concession for the holiday and let your kids spend the day with mom, recommends Divorce Help for Parents.
When she’s celebrating Mother’s Day as a single mom, this day is probably rough on her as well, so acknowledging you still respect her as a mother will boost her morale.
Help With the Planning
In many cases, Mother’s Day celebrations are planned as a joint effort by the husband and children. Even though you’re divorced, your ex-wife will still appreciate you planning the celebrations for the day, says Our Family Wizard.
Help your child make a list of suggestions for places to go out to eat, fun things to do and other places that commonly came into play during celebrations in the past.
Step Carefully Around Significant Others
If your ex-wife is dating or involved, talk with her to see if it is appropriate for you to help celebrate Mother’s Day. Her significant other may already have plans made. In that case, it’s most appropriate to send over your children with a small gift or card, and leave the rest to your ex-wife and her boyfriend.
On the other hand, if you’re dating someone inform them that you’d like to celebrate Mother’s Day with your ex-wife and children, make it clear there are no romantic feelings attached to this choice.
You don’t want to run the risk of confrontation on a day that’s supposed to be celebrating the mother of your child, so do everything you can to keep any conflict out of the celebrations. Remember, communication is key, even after a divorce.