My ex-wife continues to send bills to me beyond the scope of what I am ordered to pay via our children (7 and 10). The kids say that mom told them “If daddy really loves them, he’ll send a check home with them for this bill.”
I have perhaps started responding in the wrong manner by paying the first of these “extras.” My ex laughs about this even when I explain that her approach is unfair and hurts the kids. She says “Life is unfair, pay the bill.”
She knows that I have guilt about the reasons the marriage ended. But, it is really hard for me to pay this extra money. I have suffered severely high credit card balances as a result. What can I do?
You need to consult an attorney in your jurisdiction, however if there is nothing in your divorce decree that directs you to pay these extra expenses you just need to quit paying them. Your child support is designed to cover these expenses.
Additionally, your ex-wife should not be using your children to communicate with you; as such you should advise her that she needs to communicate directly with you.
Tiffany A. McFarland is a Senior Attorney and Litigation Manager with Cordell & Cordell, P.C. in the Overland Park, Kansas and Kansas City, Missouri offices. Ms. McFarland practices exclusively in the area of domestic relations.
Tiffany is licensed in the state of Missouri and the state of Kansas and is certified as a Guardian ad Litem.