My ex-wife and I live in separate states so I would like to know which state will handle this matter, what paperwork I need to file, and how can I get this modification without using a divorce lawyer?
I am not licensed in your state so I am unable to give you legal advice on divorce. I can give general divorce help for men, though.
The court in the state that granted the divorce would have jurisdiction to modify the order. Therefore, you would need to file a Motion to Modify with the court in the state you were divorced in.
In Missouri, where I practice, you would file a Motion to Modify Child Support. There is no specific form for this; it is a pleading that either you or your attorney would draft that would make specific allegations that, if proven, would entitle you to the legal relief you are seeking.
If you were to file a Motion to Modify in the state that granted your divorce, you would be required to submit this type of pleading and comply with all of the laws, court rules, and court procedures in that state and particular jurisdiction.
There is no requirement or court rule that requires you to be represented by an attorney in any legal matter. It is your right to handle your legal matters on your own behalf.
It is my suggestion that if you are not sure of what you are doing or how to do it, and it is important to you to make sure your rights and interests are protected, you should consult with an attorney that is experienced in the area of domestic litigation.
I would suggest that you should consult with an attorney that practices in your state that has specific experience in handling child support modifications. Remember, I have only provided you with general information, not financial advice on divorce.