Proof Of Adultery: Evidence Needed To Prove Infidelity


What counts as evidence to prove adultery?

My wife is cheating on me, and I have found her underwear that appears to have sperm from another man on it.

If a DNA test proves the infidelity, is this enough to show cause?


I am unable to give you legal advice on divorce. I can give general divorce help for men, though, my knowledge is based on New Jersey divorce laws where I am licensed to practice.

Adultery is defined as “an act of sexual intercourse by a married person with another person other than one’s spouse.”

Adultery is proven by establishing opportunity and inclination. This is normally established through the testimony of a third-party witness (i.e., private detective, neighbor, or colleague) and is usually based on circumstantial evidence.

To prove opportunity, a witness would need to testify that he/she saw the couple enter a place, such as a hotel or home, where they are alone and could have sexual relations. Inclination means that the witness observes the couple behaving affectionately towards each other, such as kissing, holding hands, etc.

You indicated that you may have DNA evidence of your wife’s infidelity. If that is the case, you will need the forensic scientist or whoever performed the DNA testing of the sample you provided to testify in court about his/her findings.

Note that in some states you may not testify against your spouse, and thus will need the testimony of a third party to corroborate the adulterous relationship.

Further, in order to file a complaint for divorce alleging adultery, your wife’s paramour or boyfriend must be named as a co-respondent in the divorce complaint. Therefore, you must be able to identify him and serve him with a copy of the complaint.

Proving adultery can be time consuming and costly. Moreover, marital fault is not a factor in some states when it comes to determining issues such as alimony or equitable distribution of property.

Therefore, you may want to consider filing a divorce complaint based on a “no-fault” cause of action, which is less costly and time consuming, if you and your divorce lawyer feel the consequences of proving marital misconduct are not significant enough to warrant pursuing a fault-based action.

Remember, I am unable to provide you with anything more than divorce tips for men, so please consult with a divorce lawyer in your jurisdiction.

To arrange an initial consultation to discuss divorce rights for men with a Cordell & Cordell attorney, including New Jersey Divorce Lawyer Christine A. Dolan, contact Cordell & Cordell.

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4 comments on “Proof Of Adultery: Evidence Needed To Prove Infidelity

    Proving one’s Adultery
    Is it possible to prove through a DNA test the adultery of a man/woman if he/she commited it years before?

    The reasons of female unfaithfulness.
    Female unfaithfulness has always upset and astonished men. That is why there are “belts of faithfulness”, abundance of guards in harems and murders of wily cheaters.
    In the 20th century sexologists tried to comfort men. They claimed that only 26% of women cheated. And the reason does not lie in sex itself but because their husbands fail to provide them with the feeling of being loved and admired and therefore women seek everything they lack with other men using their bodies as a pay. However, the supporters of this point of view have recently been severely criticized.

    The group of British scientists under Robin Baker’s supervision, – said Alexander Poleev, MD, a famous psychiatrist and sexologist has made the sensational breakthrough. Having researched 5,000 married Englishwomen aged 30-40; they discovered that 11% of their children (every ninth child) were born not of their lawful father. And these mothers did not know that, as a rule. Then the women were asked about it under the hypnosis and it turned out that their children were born as result of one-night stands, which, in 50% of cases, were totally forgotten. Furthermore, more than 50% of those liaisons took place during ovulation, i.e. 5-6 days in the middle of the menstrual cycle, when impregnation is most likely to occur and female sexual desire reaches its peak. According to the results of this research, Baker published the book called “Sex during ovulation”. After having read it, thousands of British men rushed to examine their children. And the results had been confirmed.

    -How often should a woman cheat on her husband if every ninth of them gets pregnant by her lover?

    – Actually, not that often: approximately every married woman has an affair 4-6 times.

    – Then how come there are so many children fathered by a lover?

    -Some time ago, it was believed that it was easier for a woman to get pregnant by her husband. Gynecologists still agree to treat infertility only if a woman has been having sex with one partner for more than two years. But the latest studies revealed the astonishing news: the chances to get pregnant by a casual partner are much higher, even if it was just a one-night stand.

    -There are several reasons. First of all, observing sexual life of volunteers using a video camera, sexologists discovered the following: sex in married couples gets more intense during the days when a woman can not get pregnant. Secondly, the famous Canadian scientist Patrick Macgy, studying microorganisms of the middle-aged married women’s sex organs, found the remains of sperm of a woman’s lover along with her husband’s sperm in every forth woman. He figured the time of sperm getting into the woman’s sex organs with 2-3 days accuracy and confirmed that half of the cases of female unfaithfulness fall into the time of ovulation. Besides, during ovulation a woman usually has sex with her husband as well. So, it turned out that every 15th child was conceived when in a woman’s uterus there was sperm of several men. And Robin Baker in his sensational book came to a conclusion that women have a gene of sexual unfaithfulness, which gets activated during ovulation. This gene makes them, alike females of many kinds of animals and insects, initiate a so-called “war of sperm” in their genitals.

    -And who wins?

    -As a rule, a lover wins. Baker’s team conducted another interesting research, which was repeated many times later. The scientists studied the difference in men’s ejaculation and figured that the sperm composition changes depending on a situation. It turned out that during regular sex life an average man gets into a woman 300 million spermatozoon at once. However if a man suspects his wife of cheating, then sperm quantity increases in 100 million. In other words, a husband protects himself biologically. But if a wife is constantly at home, moreover she is sick, and then the number of spermatozoon reduces to 150 million. And there is a different story in case with a lover: his new female partner gets up to 600 million sperm.

    -That means a lover has a lager number of sperm?

    -It is not just a number. He has a different composition of sperm. In every man’s sperm there is only 1 % spermatozoon capable to fertilize an egg (that is why they are called “fertilizing”). The majority, however is sperm-killers, they are nearly 85%. They have a bigger head than fertilizing ones and its head contains poisonous substance.

    If you want to catch a cheating spouse, click here…

    Check your state laws before you go through the trouble. If you live in Maryland don’t even bother to prove it. The courts don’t care, it makes no difference to them if she slept with everyone and their brother!

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