Life After Her: Online Dating (Part 2)

By Contel Bradford

Note: This is Part 2 of two-part series on tips for online dating after divorce. Click here to read Part 1. 

Many divorced dads are hesitant about jumping back into the dating scene.  After all, most of them, especially those with full custody, are more concerned with caring for their children, making a living and simply putting the past behind them.

As we all know, there often comes a time when the desire for companionship arises and a man feels the need to at least test the waters.

If a blind date hookup doesn’t sound appealing and prowling the club scene is out of the question, online dating could be the alternative that enables you to find the soul mate you thought you snagged the first time around.

Take the Kids into Account

One notable benefit of online dating is that your kids don’t have to know the intimate details of your virtual rendezvous.  If you take things slow, they don’t have to worry about you spending nights away from home, or inviting strange company over for a visit either.  So what happens when things start to get serious?  Of course it all depends on your situation, but it would be wise to allow a decent period of time to elapse before introducing your new dating partner to your child.  You definitely want to access the potential of a relationship, as your kids just may not be ready for it.  Divorce is hard on children and their stability should come before all else.  Unless you are sure the relationship will materialize into something positive, you may want to hold off on integrating a new woman into your family life.  At this point, it’s all about finding compatibility for the sake of both you and your children.

 

Don’t Reveal Too Much

As a proud father, it is very likely that you will want to create your profile to include information on your life as a parent, the types of activities you and your kids enjoy the most, and so forth.  While there is nothing wrong with this, there are many reasons you want to keep your kids out of the mix as much as possible.  For one, you want your profile to expand on more than your qualities as a great dad.  Women have learned that a good father doesn’t always translate into a good mate.  Second and more noteworthy, you need to remember that while strides have been made, the internet is still unregulated for the most part, and therefore, very dangerous.  Regardless of how comfortable you get dating online, it is advisable to never post photos or publish any personally identifiable information about your kids on the dating site.

 

Do Your Homework

There are a number of dating sites online.  Many are designed to service a broad range of people while others are specific to niche markets, such as divorced dads.  Whatever type of dating community you decide, be sure to conduct some research to give yourself a good shot at success.  Check out the reviews online and visit the forums to find out what past and existing members are saying about a particular Web site.  Use good judgment by understanding that some of the feedback you get will be negative or possibly fictitious and misleading.  The Web site review industry has become a profitable business and affiliates will promote the worst service to earn their commissions.

The concept of finding love through your computer doesn’t sound as farfetched as it did about 15 years ago.  A rewarding experience is very possible so arm yourself with all the knowledge you can about online dating.  If you decide that it’s right for you, give it a shot and most importantly, have fun with it!

Note: This is Part 2 of two-part series on tips for online dating after divorce. Click here to read Part 1. 

 

Contel Bradford is a professional freelance writer, journalist, and published author of multiple books. He specializes in many areas, including legal, divorce, and family-related topics. You can learn more about his services by visiting www.contelbradford.com.

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