5 Things To Know About Child Support Modifications

child support modifications

By Ron Gore, Cordell & Cordell Divorce Attorney

When and how to modify child support are questions that many parents find so confusing and daunting that they wind up doing nothing about their changed financial circumstances.

That can be a big mistake, and can wind up costing you a lot of money and heartache down the road. While only an attorney in your state can give you legal advice about modifying your child support order, here are five general concepts to keep in mind.

Child Support Modifications Aren’t Automatic  

Just because the factors that went into calculating your child support payment have changed, that doesn’t mean your child support order will change automatically. A great example of this is the situation in which one of the children covered in a child support order turns 18 years old.

Most people figure that the child support order for a child will stop automatically after the child turns 18 years old. After all, the child support order itself may even have language saying that child support is ordered until the child turns 18.

But the thing to keep in mind is that there isn’t anyone other than you and the other parent paying attention to the child’s ongoing child support eligibility.

The same holds true for changes in either your income or that of the other parent.

The fact that your income has gone down – or the other parent’s income has gone up – typically won’t trigger an automatic review or modification of the existing order.

So it’s important not to just sit back and expect that the order is going to change without you having to do anything, especially because…

Child Support Modifications Aren’t (Usually) Retroactive  

For the most part, changes made to child support orders only go back to the date the request for the change was filed.

So, let’s say that you were laid off on January 1st, but didn’t file your motion to modify child support until February 1st. In most cases, the court will only consider changing the child support order back to the date you filed the motion to modify.

There are exceptions to this general rule, and that’s why it’s important to consult with an attorney as soon as you know that a substantial change in any of the child support calculation factors has occurred or, even better, will occur.

Cordell & Cordell understands the concerns men face during divorce.

In Oklahoma, for example, there is a statute that allows a retroactive change in child support if a parent paying less child support because of extensive parenting time didn’t actually have the child as often as the order anticipated.

But even if both you and the other parent seem to agree that the child support order should be changed, remember that…

Child Support Modifications Aren’t (Ever!) Handshake Deals

Nobody likes going back to court. It’s expensive and time-consuming. Even just being in the courthouse can bring up a lot of bad feelings better left in the past.

However, there is something worse than going back to court modify your child support order: going back to court on a contempt charge because the other parent conveniently forgot your out-of-court agreement to change how much support you should be paying.

No matter how well you think you’ve been getting along, or how reasonable the other parent seems to be, never rely on a handshake agreement, or even a handwritten agreement out of court, to modify child support. The bottom line is that only the court has the ability to change its orders.

And, if you want the court to modify your child support order, you’ve got to…

Keep Great Records

It’s very easy to fall into a rhythm, get complacent, and stop keeping records of your child support payments, medical reimbursements, daycare expenses, etc.

And it’s no secret that dads, especially those working long hours to make their child support payments on top of paying all of the bills involved with keeping up their own household, fall behind on their recording keeping way too often.

Part of the reason dads especially get so complacent with their record keeping is that it never crosses the dad’s mind that the mother will deny receiving child support payments that he actually made. But that very thing happens every day in courts across the country.

So, how do you keep great records?

One way to do it, if possible, is to take advantage of state agency income withholding. Although the idea of inviting the government into your finances may seem counterintuitive, an income withholding order is the easiest way to keep reliable and consistent records of your child support payments.

If you’re self-employed or an income withholding order is for some other reason not the best option for you, try to set up an automatic payment through your bank with an automatic memo field showing that the payment was for the purpose of paying child support.

Remember that payments to the other parent aren’t necessarily for child support. So even if you made the child support payment, the other parent may try to claim that it was for some other debt, or was a gift, etc.

No matter what, never make your child support payment by cash – or even by money order – without getting a signed receipt from the other parent. Many dads have been found in contempt for not paying child support because the judge would not accept money order stubs as evidence of child support payments, even if when the stubs have “child support” written on them.

It’s also important to get signed receipts for your other payments, like daycare or medical expense reimbursements. Once you have those receipts, you’ve got to keep them organized and accessible, so that you can find them when you need them. But having great records of your payments isn’t enough. You have to be able to…

Get Your Payment Records Into Evidence

While this last point might seem like a no-brainer, the rules of evidence can be complicated, as many dads who tried to represent themselves in court learned too late.

You can have all of the records in the world, but if you can’t get them into evidence they won’t do you any good. That’s why it’s important to consult with an attorney early to help you prepare your case and get the best result possible on the day of court.

End of Content Icon

48 comments on “5 Things To Know About Child Support Modifications

    Our divorce was final in 2010. We have a 13 year old child who lives with me and visits his out of state father for two months of the year in summer. We were divorced in the state of Idaho but I now live in UT and the father now lives in AL.
    Child support has not been modified since the divorce was finalized and I know child’s father now makes FAR more than when original amount was set.
    It’s past time to get a modification done, but do I file for it in Idaho or Utah? What kind of documentation is generally needed? Do I need to know my ex’s income amount?

    You weren’t with him when he started making more money, so why do you feel like you are entitled to it. You’ve been divorced for 8 years, his success isn’t yours. You probably make more money too, have you reported that to your ex so maybe he wouldn’t have to pay as much?

    So my Ex and I aren’t happy with Ohio child support services. Her lawyer enrolled her after the support order was published. They have lost more than 2k. Some how they sent my money to PA child support services. I started paying in Feb my ex didn’t get a payment till May. We both agree they suck and would rather set up an allotment through my employer. How do we remove ohio child support services from our lifes?

    Filed a support mod in Fl as original order was temporary, 10 years running. Laws changed and original order didn’t include step down or end date. Now that one child is 21, 2nd child is 18 and quit school, that leaves a 15.5 yr old. Ex wife asked courts twice for retro support from date of separation, 1st time in the divorce where they reserved ruling on it AND ongoing. Ex wife filed a mod 2 yrs later asking for retro AND ongoing, was only awarded ongoing. Now that she’s aware I’m attempting a modification to include step down, end dates, and reduction based on income changes for both of us she is threatening asking again for retro from date of separation even though last child only has 2.5 yrs left on order. Is this common? What’s the likelihood of a court awarding retro when they reserved twice already 10+ yrs ago?

    I have our 14 yo twins with me and he has our daughter that has now turned 18. Our child support was off set by our 1 child with him. The money that I was supposed to be paying just came out of the support that he paid for the 2 that are with me. How do I “stop child support” for our 18 yo? Do I have to go back to court?

    I pay $300 a week for child support one of the girls just turned 18 and graduated high school so I decided to put 150 so my ex went down to the courthouse and put me in contempt of court and told me I had to wait for it to be modified before I can stop it I thought it made sense if I have two kids one is 18 then I take away the 150 so I only put 150 a week in her account it’s not good enough for her so she’s taking us back to court I have paid for everything for years I’ve given my kids everything I am so broke I have no money to do anything and she keeps coming after us for for every little thing what do I do

    I pay 300 a week for 2 children one of them just graduated high school and she is 18 so I decided to put 150 in my ex act and now she is taking me back to court she said I have to pay till it get modified I thought is was fair 300 for two now there is one so 150 And now she want me to sign papers for college.
    Am I responsible for college too I have paid everything for years I feel man have no rights and I am broke all the Time

    I know my ex lied about his income from his new job (he had just gotten) when we settled our dissolution but I cannot prove it. However, I would like to file a motion for modification down the road because a it is evident to me he is making more now and I am the one paying him child support and paying 68% of unreimbursed medical, dental, extracurricular activites for our kids. My question is, how do I go about getting his financial records like wage statements at this point?

    Ok so I am a mother and my son father wants to lower his child support payments..now I haven’t been receiving my payments at all and when he goes to see his father he ask to make sure our son has food with him…he currently have a daughter with a woman he left me for and gives her all his money, food stamps and my son also told me that he doesn’t take him to the store when he takes his daughter…plus he has been locked up for 3/4 yrs due to rape by this women he’s still with… which means no payments….he says he lives somewhere else but he’s living with her and haven’t finished out his sentence….I have all the text messages….what should I do… because my son wants to play basketball… he’s growing like a weed, please help.

    I would forget the loser. Look for a new start in life with a new responsible man. Then show your son how you are the better parent. Get educated and independent so you don’t have to depend on someone who is not there for you. Focus on yourself and your son’s happiness.

    Get this… my ex sends me a copy of modification agreement changing custody of 1 out of our 4 to joint and changing childsupport amount due to me only having the 3 now. Now remember like most of the people out there I could not afford an attnory and to top it off Jive in Utah and my ex his wife and now my oldest live in Georgia. I tried to do everything myself reading different laws and rights and so on
    So anyways I look at the document and it shows the amount that I’m responsible for and at the same time I’m thinking to myself they are making me pay Georgia’s child support rates while my ex-husband is still on Utah rates which is much lower but but it still was low enough that I would still scrape by possibly making a new budget. And we’re also mentioned to me that I will not be paying him directly that it would come out of the child support I was receiving every month. I agree with the modification and the next thing I know I receive this court paperwork signed by the judge showing that I have to pay double what I was shown. I am devastated and I do not know what to do. The crazy thing is is I am almost paying half of what he would have to pay for the three kids and I’m only paying for one it makes no sense especially when he makes four times more than I do how’s the wife who makes double if not triple and now he’s willing to do this just to hurt me and try to get the remaining three to live with him telling them that he has more money and they will have fun with him. He doesn’t even want my children he just doesn’t want to pay for them. Not quite sure where he thinks that having all four in his home will be cheaper than what he was paying me per month. I had all four children for at least 12 years without him so much as seeing them but maybe a couple times a year and only calling on birthdays. Now all of a sudden he wants to be look like father of the year with his new wife new home new car and my poor kids are the ones that will suffer in the end. I talked to a Utah lawyer who cannot help me into the different laws between states but even he was appalled and told me I got played by my ex’s lawyer and my ex not quite sure where I’m going to pull out $2,500 retainer but I guess I’ll keep trying to figure this one out. Like my ex told me the one with the money always wins and that he would see me in court while I was losing.

    Granddaughter is turning 18 this month has already graduated and support ends for her but the ex is taking son back to court for more support for younger child since oldest is going off. How is this fair? Because support ends for one why should they be able to go back to court for more $ for the younger child. She also works.

    im a father of 2, one’s 13 and lives in the SAME city as i do. Mom lives with her new husband in Orlando Fl. i live in Pensacola, FL. im paying $550/mo to the state while i see my child all the time as i work and he will spend time with grandparents. my question is how can i get this case dropped… she has no means to see her son and im just GIVING money away on top of buying him gear… this state is horrendous to us fathers.

    Husband and wife divorced with no custody or support agreement. Child recently turned 18 and is graduating in 2 weeks. Ex wife is threatening to go to court now to get back support that was never ordered or agreed. Can she do that? She is also claiming rights to a pending inheritance due to ex husband. We are in PA.

    I live in NJ. My son is now 19 and I’ve paid child support since he was 5 when we were divorced. At the time of the divorce I was making $30,ooo more per year than I am currently. I’ve been at that level for over the last 6 years and have struggled to make h payments. I’ve had to move back to my parents in order to afford it. But things are getting tighter and I can really use the financial relief so I can get back out on my own. What are the odds of me getting my payment reduced at this stage of the game. I’m also concerned about stirring up a hornets nest with my ex and having my son take any grief over it. Can’t afford an attorney so was just going to submit the paperwork myself. Any thoughts?

    Divorced in 2002. Youngest of two sons will be 19 in August. His older brother is in college. Understood I would be done with child support when youngest graduates, but ex-wife threatened to go to court in her new state she lives in and get more if I don’t do as she says.
    After reviewing the divorce I’ve found out the judge threw out the child support order because we both moved away and it was never enforced. I’ve paid not knowing that information and always listening to her threats.
    I have paid on loans she was required by the court to pay, and child support we agreed on.
    So my question is, what is the process if she decides to stir it all up again. I thinking of suing her for the loans she never paid and I’m still paying.

    My son has lived with me since june…..it is now Feb and my modification court day is march 1st. Do I get to receive back support for money that was taking from me during this long process??

    Cj

    Clarence, what happened in Court on March 1st? Were you granted the modification, and if so, how do they work the overpayment you made all those months? Do you get a straight up credit for a number of months, not having to pay til the overage is reached, or do they give it ‘back’ to you by slightly lower payments until the overpayment is satisfied? We’re in the same boat and wondering how they will apply the thousands of dollars in overpayment should our modification be approved by the judge.

    I waived child support. At my devoice hearing. A few years latter I got a letter from DSS saying if I didn’t take my ex wife to court for child support my daughter would loose her Medicaid. I did it and now my ex pays whenever she feels like it. Which is not often. Now my ex says she shouldn’t be getting child support. Anyone know if I was wrong?

    It makes sense that a child support payment won’t change over night just because circumstances have changed. Trying to negotiate lowering your child support payment would probably be something that would be difficult to do on your own as well. At least passing what you want to do through a lawyer might be a good idea to give you a better chance at getting those things changed.

    I am married to My babys father but I grew up in a split home and I have 2 step kids that live out of state. My husband pays almost 500 dollars in child support for these 2 children which is over a 3rd of our net income after our car payment. We also take care of Our son, my two under age sisters and My (not yet disabled) epileptic mother…. My step kids mother is on disability, doesnt work and continues tobtell us she doesnt see our money after we have explained to her we actually pay her state aid with our child support through the state of Alaska. Worst part: My Husband and I havent seen Our kids in almost 3years. They have never met their Baby Brother who is almost 2. Tell me how this is fair. Legally in the papers we are suppose to pay for the children to come to visit and She is suppose to pay to take them back home. We were going to use income tax last year to pay to brinf them down to Arkansas. But child support took nost of our income tax and she mentioned she might get the check and if she does she will use that to oay for it all…ywah I dont think they got it since its been 8 months. Or..she did and isnt telling us. I am so upset and it just drives me insane that this is even allowed.

    Blevins,

    Hate to be the bearer of bad news but if 500 is more than 1/3 of your shared net income you need to find better paying jobs. Even if you both made 12.00 an hour full time that would be 2800 ish a month net between you both. And 500 would not be too bad.

    File for modification for 2 kids it should not exceed 30% of his net pay.

    I had to file Chapter 13. I have 4 children that I currently have a child support order for. Now I work two jobs to pay all my bills. Now one of my children’s mother requesting for a review modification of child support. Can the courts increase my child support while I’m in bankruptcy?

    I am working a full time job and a part time job, paying for a tiny little one bedroom, hole in the wall apartment for myself, and paying child support for 2 children and am left with nothing. I can barely make ends meet, can barely buy groceries, do my laundry, pay my own utilities. My ex has not worked and is completely able to do so. The kids are in middle school and highschool, so she isn’t staying home to take care of young children. And, to top it off, the children are with me at least 3 days a week every week. If I am working so much, have the kids almost half of the week, but am barely hanging on and can’t afford a lawyer, what should I do?

    First and formost. Apply for food stamps. Get on government record sonewhere that you have your kids with you over half the week amd you have to provide food for them. Talk the mothers into signing papers saying “I am aware that my son/daughter has been staying here at least 3 days a week since (this date) … Once you have that..theres your proof they are with you. Child support will be lowered and hopefully you can file for joint custody and you wont have to pay at all. They dont want you to know that because that gives youbcontrol. All women want more money. Dont let them fool you. I am married to My babys father but I grew up in a split home and I have 2 step kids that live out of state. My husband pays almost 500 dollars in child support for these 2 children which is over a 3rd of our net income after our car payment. We also take care of Our son, my two under age sisters and My (not yet disabled) epileptic mother…. My step kids mother is on disability, doesnt work and continues tobtell us she doesnt see our money after we have explained to her we actually pay her state aid with our child support through the state of Alaska. Worst part: My Husband and I havent seen Our kids in almost 3years. They have never met their Baby Brother who is almost 2. Tell me how this is fair.

    I have been paying child support religiously for about 7 yrs my son is turning 8 in August. Never been late since the court order was put in place. I recently became unemployeed missed a few payments got a new job trying to get my new employeer to set up payment with the account the state of Illinois has set up which I have been paying into. My new employeer say they will not because court order says my name not the company’s nam and now my son mom is hounding me about payment. I am totallly willing to make payments but not directly to her I want to cover my back, so how do I go about setting that up with my bank so my payments are on time and I keep my track record good? Also insurance rates are at a higher premium with the company Iam with now so can I deduct that amount that I am paying for my sons health insurance from my child support payment not too mention she is suppose to provide health insurance as well but never has this is according to our parental agreement that became a cour order. Any advice is much appreciated

    Get chikd support to to automatic payments on the days you get paid every month. You will have to call them eveey month to tell them which days you get paid when they are direct deposited. Then on the same days you get paid, they will automatically tale the payment out once your check has been cleared through your bank. Thays the next easiest way unless you wamt to remember eveey morning you get paid call child support and make the payment over the phone

    My child support was court ordered in the divorce settlement for my two boys..but one is 23 and married already. I had a state job in Iowa at the time, but due to a hostile environment, I left the position and worked anywhere hiring. After being let go…as all temp. jobs do right before your 6-month mark, I decided to move to South Texas in hopes of obtaining a career in oil fields. Again, I am working temp jobs, until I can get my clearance (TWIC CARD). The pay here meanwhile is WAYYYY less than Iowa and I can’t afford to live much less pay an attorney. Is there any agency that can help me? Texas child support has contacted Iowa on several occasions and is being ignored and in turn, ignore my plea because they “can’t do anything until they respond. Signed – Broke and feed up.

    My child support was court ordered in the divorce settlement for my two boys..but one is 23 and married already. I had a state job in Iowa at the time, but due to a hostile environment, I left the position and worked anywhere hiring. After being let go…as all temp. jobs do right before your 6-month mark, I decided to move to South Texas in hopes of obtaining a career in oil fields. Again, I am working temp jobs, until I can get my clearance (TWIC CARD). The pay here meanwhile is WAYYYY less than Iowa and I can’t afford to live much less pay an attorney. Is there any agency that can help me? Texas child support has contacted Iowa on several occasions and is being ignored and in turn, ignore my plea because they “can’t do anything until they respond. Signed – Broke and feed up.

    I agree that it is important to make sure you get everything in writing when dealing with child support. It is important to remember that having an attorney with you can provide the support you need and the best course of action to follow. Personally, I think that it always pays off to take the time to educate yourself and find a lawyer that has experience dealing with cases like yours.

    MODIFY HUH ? EVERYTHING YOU SPEAK OF ATTORNEY WE HAVE DONE AGAIN AND DOING AGAIN RIGHT NOW WITH AND WITHOUT AN ATTORNEYFOR THESE FOLKS TO STILL DO THE SAME THING…. WELL SOMEBODY HAS TO PAY THE MONEY BACK TO THE COUNTY THEY SAY…. YES I AGREE THAT LYING DECEITFUL WOMAN THAT COMMITED FRAUD AND USED A CHILD TO PLAY MUNIPULATION. WHEN DOES THE VICIOUS CYCLE END YOU ROBE A INNOCENT MAN AND I DO MEAN INNOCENT WHO IS A WOUNDED COMBAT VET AND THIS IS THE THANKS HE GETS FOR PUTTING HIS LIFE ON THE LINE NOT ONCE BUT TWICE.. SO THESE JUDGES AND CHILD SUPPORT SERVICES CAN SLEEP WELL GO TO COURT THE NEXT DAY AND RUIN ANOTHER LIFE…

    @john I Duno how your state works but if your making less than you did the last time you got reviewed for support,than it will probably go down.i live in pa I was taken back about year in a half ago when I made crazy overtime not anymore !domestic relations advised me to have my order reevaluate sence I don’t make that ot anymore

    The ex-wife told a falsehood on the FL-195 (Calif.) saying I make more than I did/do so she gets 2/3’s – 3/4’s of my income, the oldest is 22 1/2 and youngest (of 2) is now 19, she changed her phone number, her address as well as her lady name.
    I lost most of the papers in a near death swim from my car in trop storm Rita as I had made copies earlier that day and still in the back seat. My lawyer tried to serve her using last know address……failed. to save money on rent I moved to Texas with mom and brother, I’ll be paying child support till I die, I can’t afford to by shoes or cut my hair sometimes.

    Hello, i was divorced in 2010 and ordered to pay child support. I filed chapter 13 in 2014 and just recieved a child support review in the mail. Im barely making ends meet now, can my payments increase ?

    Yes if you don’t appeal the order and show documents to prove your incomeand other children that you’re obligated to. This is Missouri state

    This is interesting and nice to keep saying get an Attorney to help. When 50% of your income goes for child support and the other 50% doesn’t cover the bills, who can afford an Attorney? To qualify for legal aide they take the full income and tell you that you don’t qualify for assistance. To be realistic the money going for child support should be subtracted from the income in order to get what the person has left to work with. Also, why are they paying for child care, medical and dental bills in addition to the child support. That is just ridiculous! If I make $1200 a month I have to pay the bills out of it and figure out how to pay the child care, medical and dental out of that same $1200. Some women get their income and an additional $1200 in child support and collect an additional 50 to 80% for the child care etc. Pay it out of the child support!! Some of these guys are killing themselves working considerable overtime and/or an additional job to keep their heat turned on, buy food and pay for their own health care so they don’t end up ill and out of work. PS SLEEP is important too!!!

    AGREED
    it blows my mind how courts can legally do this. My bebee momma has been an utter parasite since BEFORE our sons were born, still not working a day for nearly a decade now while i support my sons AND her expensive tastes. Cant help but feel Lawyers and the whole judicial system is a huge scam. How does ANYONE with common sense think any of this is ‘fair?’

    A mistake I made was not modifying support after daughter no longer needed daycare. Years later I had to repay what I thought I was getting as child support.
    If I had modified the amount timely, I would have received more and not get a bill for an unused expense that had been figured into child support.

    This is nice and all… but the same issue keeps popping up.

    Get an attorney/Can’t give you legal advice.
    All the above is for naught and never helps someone who pays 55%-65% of their paychecks for childsupport.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *